Have you ever heard the saying that you are the sum of the 5 people you spend the most time with? Or that if you are the smartest person in the room, you’re in the wrong room? Whether or not you adhere to either of those ideas it is true that the people around us can have a big influence on what we think and how we feel about things.

Do you have someone in your life who always rains on your parade? Someone who never has anything positive to say? Or maybe someone who exhausts you with pointless drama or encourages you to be the worst version of yourself instead of the best one?

Think about your friends, family, coworkers, and any acquaintances you regularly spend time with. Do you have any competitive relationships? Theses are often characterized by criticism, one-upmanship, backstabbing, gossiping, and engaging in other negative behaviors. Or do you sometimes notice that after you spend time with someone, you feel exhausted or depressed when you didn’t feel that way before? Is there anyone who attempts to manipulate or control you? Or maybe someone who demands that you take sides in a fight? Or who treats you like a child? How much time do you spend after seeing one of these people thinking or saying negative things?

If you have anyone in your life who fits the above description or has some other obvious negative effect on your life, it might be time to declutter them the way you would declutter physical objects that longer serve you.

So how do you declutter these kinds of relationships? Here are three techniques you can use alone or together.

1. Regroup: Pull your energy back from the negative interaction. Refuse to participate in the drama by saying nothing, changing the subject, or leaving the room.
2. Avoid: Limit your time with people who bring you down.
3. Set Boundaries: Let people know that there are certain kinds of behavior that you won’t put up with anymore.

The good news is that toxic people tend to fall out of your life naturally as you spend more and more of your time in a positive frame of mind. Simply taking the above steps will probably declutter a few people from your life without particularly difficult conversations or confrontations. When you stop giving the toxic person the thing they’re looking for, they will move on and find other, easier prey. However, with some, it may require the courage to stand up for yourself and make some difficult choices. But your mindset and your life will start to feel better almost instantly.