There’s a lot of inspirational memes that can keep a person positive, but when you suffer from a mental illness, it takes a LOT of digging through the dark, and removal of unconscious, deep-seated methods that served as survival-mechanisms growing up with trauma, to get to a point of truly interpreting your own entangled thoughts.

I was hospitalized for the second time with suicidal ideations in January 2019. I felt hopeless, and the only thing holding me to this life was the thought of leaving my daughters without a Mother. In my short time there, I was blessed with meeting an amazing soul who was one of the psychologists, and she gave me this book that really started the healing process for me. When I was finally released from the hospital, I was still suffering majorly with my depression, and I knew it was going to bring up a lot of suppressed emotions to work on this particular book. It includes tapping sequences, daily prayers, daily journal entries, and a huge focus on bringing past turmoil and traumas to the surface in order to work toward forgiving others, but mostly myself. Once I finished reading the book, I started applying the lessons it taught and shedding the many years of hatred, anger, and low self-worth; I felt like I could finally breathe after 20 years of weight being lifted.

Now, in such a seemingly short amount of time, I’ve found more strength than I’ve ever felt in my entire life. I have cut out people from my life that don’t deserve to know the new me, stopped participating in habits inhibiting my ability to progress, and I’ve found a whole new appreciation and love for others, myself, and my life. Since then, I have been committed to strengthening my spiritual and mental health with a brand new perspective of forgiveness and self-acceptance, and things are FINALLY manifesting the way I could have only hoped for before! It took a lot of digging, forgiving, and releasing it to something bigger than myself. This is where my love for God/The Universe took place. By letting go of control, I have never felt more in control of who I am and my vision that the Universe has prepared me for. It’s such an unfamiliar feeling, because I’ve always been in defense mode — waiting for the other shoe to drop and never truly feeling happiness or security. Happiness in my present and future life is worth the discomfort that takes place before I reap the rewards I’m after. My past will NEVER again keep me from manifesting my dreams and fulfilling my purpose to myself, my family, and my daughters. I can only hope to help as many as I can come to this place in their lives, as well, because it is truly amazing to feel this way. It’s as though you go from not breathing or having a life, to finally LIVING… I’m no longer in the mode to merely survive; I’ve turned on the switch for continuity to thrive!