The phone rang and I looked at the caller identification on the landline screen. It was the third time she had called. She was calling for my Mom, who was out of town. I answered the call to reassure the lady my Mom would call her back. She was pleased to hear my voice and the information I relayed her. I tried to disconnect from the phone but she wanted to know more. She’d lost contact with my Mom for years and was pressing me for information about myself.

My nudge of intuition knew this phone call would unravel as it did. “How have you been doing, Angela?” I thought to myself, she obviously doesn’t remember how private and secretive I am (hm secretive is not the right word… more like I share information selectively). “Doing well,” I replied with enthusiasm to hopefully satisfy her request. “You’re married, right?” I cringed with this question. “No, I’m not married.” Silence and then a big sigh of “Oh, either is my daughter and she lives with me.” I quickly responded and reacted with, “There’s nothing wrong with that.” I changed the subject quickly and ended the phone call shortly after that.

As I clicked “End” on the receiver, I felt a deep pain in my stomach. Does society still believe that marriage is necessary and equals happiness? Especially with the female population. I can count on both hands how many people I’ve run into at the store, parking lot, or coffee shop with the first question after realization of who I am, “Are you married?” Some might say it’s merely an inquisitive question or a simple common question. But I don’t believe that.

I grew up with four brothers being the only sister. I found it’s always people questioning the female about marriage. I know many people who are happy married. However, there is a crystal clear awareness of the high percentage of divorce rates and people who stay married unhappily.

I’m not saying I’ll never get married. In fact, I was engaged in my early 20’s (more on that in another article). I think it’s time to stop equating marriage with success or the only way for a female to live. Stop listening to your ego who believes without marriage, you are somehow inadequate or small. There are many paths to choose from in life and looking to marriage in order to fill some void or keeping up with crowds is a sure fire way to land in a divorce statistic.

Happiness comes from within, regardless of your sex. Looking for happiness elsewhere will be pointless. Take a look at celebrities with almost everything available to them (besides happiness as it comes from within). People often purchase material and non-material things to feel and fuel their happiness… cars, clothing, social media recognition, jobs, titles, vacation homes, and large homes/condos full of “things” they have no real use for and never even use.

Marriage can be defined as a union of two people. There is no timeframe to finding a person to live happily with – much more importantly; there is no better time than now to discover happiness within you. The most important relationship you’ll ever have is with yourself is not only a cheesy quote but a very accurate one indeed.

Listen at: https://youtu.be/3ojdJlKM-mg