Yoga ain’t about honesty. It’s about positivity. It’s about being nice…publicly.

Here’s 10 things your favorite yoga mat neighbor or yoga teacher will never admit to.

1.  “Ann Coulter showed me this posture.”

2.  “Didja know McDonald’s is bringing back the McRib sandwich this week?”

3.  “Cool tattoo….I’ve never seen the ‘Ring of Swimming Dolphins’ before.”

4.  “Isn’t this the gay-naked-hot-yoga class?”

5.  “Everybody hold your postures…this is an effing robbery!”

6.  “Would you mind moving? I can’t see myself in the mirror.”

7.  “Let me be frank: I became a yoga teacher to hook up with hot girls.”

8.  “Wanna go hunting this weekend? Psyched.”

9.  “Sarah Palin.”

10.  “It was me. I farted.”

Bonus round: what else?