I’ve been wasting a lot of energy these last few days wondering about a situation that involves someone in my life. I’ve gone back and forth in my head night after night, day after day playing two opposite scenarios back and forth. I’ve even begun to stress a bit playing out the less desirable scenario more often and trying to understand how I would deal with it if that one played out. I’m betting you’ve done the same thing at some point in your life.
On Sunday, I sat with a friend who has been in love with a woman for a while now.
Although she often gives him signs of hope, he is most of the time; left in the dark wondering. The pain was palatable on his face as he shared with me a few of the scenarios in his mind as he tried to make sense of it all. In that moment; I witnessed the back and forth wondering that wastes oh so much of our energy and time.
So, what if we all just came out in the open and asked the hard questions? What if we spoke our vulnerabilities out loud and asked vs. wondering? Sure it’s painfully embarrassing, even awkward at times; but it sure beats the alternative of confusion and wonder.
Do you love me?
In this man’s case: do you want to be with me?
Will you give me a raise?
Will you help me?
Are you thinking of leaving?
Are you drinking? Are you scared? Are you bored? Do you want kids? Are you thinking of laying me off?
Seriously; what if we just played straight with one another? How much energy would be given back to us in our lives if we removed the main energy drain of our crazy mind’s wondering, and just put it all out in the open?
We may not like what we hear, or quite possibly we may be thrilled; but the most important point to remember is that the mystery will be solved~and when light is shed on any situation; wondering finally stops. When that wondering fully comes to a halt, there is a peace that surrounds us. Peace that comes with truth.
Wondering disturbs peace. Peace can’t navigate multiple scenarios in your head. Peace can only come after you’ve been brave; after you asked the hard questions, and when you have finally received clarity regardless of the outcome.
When you struggle with wondering, clarity IS the door to peace in all scenarios.
~photo by dcodrin from freedigitalphotos .net