I really don’t care, at all, what you eat. ~ Kimberly Johnson

Via Recovering Yogi
on Dec 29, 2011
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Originally published by our elephriends over at Recovering Yogi on December 12, 2011. 

I really don’t care, at all, what you eat.

By Kimberly Johnson

I hate being bored.

It’s a struggle since, life does include a lot of repetitive necessities — like brushing your teeth twice a day, for instance. But I have to say there is nothing more boring than a table full of yogis discussing their food choices.

Actually, I guess that depends on how you look at it. A self-righteous caloric cockfight, in one sense, could be considered entertaining. Think David Wolfe versus Sharon Gannon in an MTV Celebrity Deathmatch. However, I guess I have just been privy to way too many a vegan/raw food showdown to find it even vaguely interesting. Really.

“I’ve been raw for five years.”

“I got rid of my stove.”

“I’ve been a vegetarian since I was born.”
“You have NEVER eaten meat?”

“Do you eat meat?” (teacher trainee to me, loaded question)
“Yes, I do. I was a vegetarian for 20 years, but started eating meat when I was pregnant.” (note slightly defensive response with caveat — mentioning menstruation or pregnancy usually earns an honorary deference card)
“WHY?” (shocked)
“Because my body started craving meat and I started dreaming about hamburgers.” (true)
“Your baby was wanting meat; same thing happened to me” (another teacher trainee)
“How could your baby know what it wants?” (first trainee, flabbergasted)
“I don’t know what my baby wanted, but I wanted to eat hamburgers.”

This is more than I wanted to say about my food choices. But these are all conversations I overheard at lunch!

Unless you are telling me about the hunk of goat cheese that you just ate with some buckwheat-walnut-breadish thing with fresh figs soaked in rose water on salad greens, I don’t want to hear about it. (I didn’t just make that up, it was a crazily delicious meal I just had in Paris.)

While I am stating my preferences, for the record, I would love to hear about your food orgasms. (I know, the title is kind of a lie) The things that really turn you on. If those happen to be raw or vegan, so be it. I love me some nori and some raw coconut truffles. But if they happen to be sweetbreads or Brazilian barbeque, that’s fine too. I will share in your enthusiasm, even if I do wince.

But if your righteousness is getting in the way of your kindness, or your sense of humor for that matter, eat a Big Mac* and be a nice person.

* I did eat hamburgers while I was pregnant, but no big Macs.

About Kimberly Johnson

Kimberly Johnson is a yogini nomad who recently put the earth boots on for motherhood. After a lengthy love affair with India, she was relieved to fall in love with Brazil—and a Brazilian—and now lives in Rio de Janeiro with her 3-year-old Brazilian daughter. She leads retreats on the most beautiful place on earth: Ilha Grande, an island with 100 beaches and no cars; leads teacher trainings; and tries not to pronounce Sanskrit with a Portuguese accent. Rearranged by childbirth in every way, she travels, teaches, and learns about what yoga has to do with womanhood.

Visit Kim online at:



About Recovering Yogi

Far from the land of meaningless manifestation, vacuous positivity, and boring yoga speak lives Recovering Yogi, the voice of the pop spirituality counterculture and an irreverent forum where yogis, ex-yogis, never-yogis, writers, and readers converge to burst the bubble of sanctimonious rhetoric. We are critical thinkers and people who just love to laugh. Visit us on our web site for some straight talk, join the discussion on Facebook or Twitter, or buy a t-shirt and support our mission.


6 Responses to “I really don’t care, at all, what you eat. ~ Kimberly Johnson”

  1. Lorin says:

    Posted to Elephant Food Facebook and Twitter.

    Lorin Arnold
    Blogger at The VeganAsana
    Associate Editor for Elephant Food
    Co-Editor for Elephant Family

  2. I never felt more alive than during the couple of years I was raw. Now I'm just vegan. But I guess you don't care unless I have a foodgasm to give you. Oh well.
    I made Christmas dinner for a group of omnivores and had no complaints. That was foodgasm enough for me. Peace Out, Ray
    PS I guess most fruits at perfect ripeness are the most delicious things.

  3. Lauren says:

    The most joygasmic meal for me, which is likely to ruffle some vegan feathers, is deer tenderloin braised in red wine and rosemary, topped with sauteed shiitake mushrooms, paired with spiced baby carrots, wild rice, and a glass of shiraz. Oh yesss.

  4. littlethaibird says:

    I LOVE THIS!!! I was totally cracking up thinking of myself and how I have had to pull my own "YOU EAT THAT?!!!" stick out of my bum. I switched up the way I eat over a year ago. I went from being a total carnivore and following the typical standards of how we are "taught" to eat to eating raw/whole foods/vegetarian – I have never felt better physically. That whole process taught me how to listen to my body and what it needs as opposed to what I want… which is where I totally understand your craving for meat during pregnancy/monthly fun-zies cause I totally do and no amount of iron/vitamin B packed veggies would (or does) kill that craving. Inasmuch as I mostly stick to a vegetarian diet, I love Lonely Lane Farms Pork and Niman Ranch ham steak is amazing in homemade Mac-n-Cheese. Oh, and I also have this issue… my foodgasms… Cheese Bread = LOVE. Sushi. I. Love. It. And I can eat disgusting amounts of it. I make a killer "Breakfast Tuna Fish Sandwich" (see la petite beauxo on facebook), but the biggest and greatest one of all… Swiss Meringue Buttercream. Sends me over the top every time 🙂

    Overall, I have to say, the switch has been so learning and exciting for this food lover and has helped me appreciate (through making and eating) all styles of eating and embracing the questions from others as they come. I giggled when a friend of mine asked me where I get my protein from – a question I used to ask my veg/vegan friends all the time. It's been great to learn so much about food, but honestly, I came to realize how much it taught me about myself and my spirit toward others. Thanks for such a great article!

  5. Jerry O'Donnell says:

    It is a funny little article that strike a chord on the surface, and yes there are those out there whose vocal food choices are a sort of bragging and self righteousness. However, one of the goals of yoga is a continual opening up of ones consciousness and being more mindful, in all areas of ones life. Eventually to include where are food comes from, what we are putting in our bodies and the suffering of said food on it's journey to our mouths. This consciousness/mindfulness is uncomfortable for many, and possibly the annoyance one feels when we hear of some talking about eating as a vegan might just be the bell of mindfulness. Taking into account the pain and suffering of other sentient beings that results in actions like "“Because my body started craving meat and I started dreaming about hamburgers.”, is ignoring the call to consciousness and mindfulness. And when you say, "But if your righteousness is getting in the way of your kindness, or your sense of humor for that matter, eat a Big Mac* and be a nice person.", being mindful of what a hamburger actually is… you might have to redefine what you mean by "kind" and "nice". Food for thought. All the best.

  6. Carol Horton says:

    I love the last sentence* (*but appreciate the caveat). 🙂