4.5
April 23, 2012

Are You Dating Someone Who’s Married to Their Job? ~ Stephanie Bailey

When you date someone who is married to their job, nothing comes before work.

This is a person who will go to work early, stay late and work every weekend. Someone who’s married to their job is so devoted to their job that making room for someone else is not a priority.

People who are married to their job will, once in a while, get glimpses of being lonely. When this does happen, the desire to want to be in a relationship radiates so strongly that if you meet someone who’s married to their job you wouldn’t be fully aware how important their job really is.

Someone who’s married to their job will convince themselves (and you) that they want and actually will make time for a relationship. The problem: old habits are hard to break and for this person, seemingly impossible.

This type of person will ask you to be understanding and patient—a lot! They will string you along by telling you that their schedule will lighten up, creating more available time to spend with you. Who doesn’t like a glimpse of hope to hang on to, especially if you really like someone? Unfortunately, spending more time together rarely happens.

After a month or maybe as long as three, hearing someone who’s married to their job consistently singing the same “Be patient” lyrics is a song that gets old.

A person who’s married to their job will cancel plans with you last minute and move “normal” dinner date times (5:30/6:30pm) to late date times (8/9pm) because they are stuck at work. This person is not only completely mentally drained, but also half asleep during your late date …finding it difficult to be fully present.

Being with someone who’s motivated and driven to be successful can be great, but it will come between relationships.

Often when people put their careers before their significant other, it’s an indication that they are emotionally unavailable, using their job to “hide behind” in order to avoid getting emotionally attached to anyone. Someone who’s married to their job would rarely admit or take ownership of their lack of availability because they aren’t fully aware of their emotional detachment toward you.

Everyone can “be busy.”

When you care about someone, you will figure out a way to make time for them.

Bottom line: it’s better to be with someone who works to live not lives to work. At the end of the day you should want to be with someone who’s wrapped around you versus wrapped around their job.

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Stephanie Bailey