A Call to the Sacred Masculine: Ten Daring Invitations from the Divine Feminine.

Via Lori Ann Lothian
on May 29, 2012
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Photo: Michael Julian Berz

If I am going to act like a goddess, I want a man who acts like a god.

Yet all this talk lately of the goddess and the Divine Feminine seems like new-age wishful thinking, a fantasy archetype with as much to do with real life as Superwoman or the Fairy God Mother.


While goddess propagandists promote the unilateral concept of a spiritually elevated womanhood—strong but supple, decisive and nurturing, wild yet wise—glaringly absent is a call to the Sacred Masculine counterpoint. Women can forever rally around each other, cheerleading new heights of intuitive and open-hearted power, but without the cooperation of menfolk stealing their own fire from the gods, we are preaching to the sistah choir.

Bottomline? Organizing a spiritual revolution as women without inviting men to the front lines with us means we are orchestrating a collective reframe with only half the available power. Real change means humanity—yes both genders—opts for the cosmic upgrade to Divine Class together.

So, on behalf of the X chromosome, here is my invitation to mortal men who wish to dance as gods with wanna-be goddesses.

1. Show us your heroic heart. We know you want to save what is worth saving and to rescue this planet from peril. Wage a hero’s battle against poverty, needless strife, environmental ruin or whatever stirs your courageous heart. It might be a plan to increase your neighborhood safety, to improve your child’s education, to plant a vegetable garden in your backyard or to stop prejudice wherever you see it. The world needs your brave heart to take bold action.

2. Unsheathe your sword. As a man, you wield a sword of truth that can cut through cultural distractions to what really matters. The faster car, the better sports team, the bigger salary are all fine and dandy but on your deathbed, what unfulfilled vision will you regret the most? What risk did you back away from? What chance did you refuse to take? Before you die, be bold enough to discover and live your truth.

3. Dare to dream. Before you played the role of mortal, you (well, we) created the heavens and earth. What do you wish to create here and now? What beautiful order do you wish to bring forth from the chaos of this world. What implausible dream do you want to manifest for the greater good of all? It doesn’t have to be grand, like solving world hunger. It can be simple, like solving your child’s homework problem because you are dedicated to being a great father. All we care about is that something brings you alive with passion.

4. Steer the ship. Aim your life for a noble horizon. It’s not like there’s a second in command who will captain your destiny while you snooze on the sofa after too many beers and potato chips with the TV droning in the background. Get to the helm of your life and navigate by your own pole star, the true north of your heart’s burning desire. Tip: if you don’t know what port you’re headed for, no wind is favorable.

5. Bring your soul to work. Work for more than the mortgage and car payments—work because you find some measure of joy in your job. And if the job is just to make ends meet for now, then meet that employment with gratitude and a call to service. Know that it’s not what you do, but what you bring to what you do, that matters.

6. Care deeply. As a man, you might have been taught to feel lightly and think hard, to hold your emotions back, as if you can build a dam against what naturally must flow. But your caring is what this world cries for. The tender-hearted masculine is both wise and merciful. When you weep, you give women permission to be strong. When your heart breaks we want to know it so that we can heal it together.

7. Love fearlessly. Show us the way by standing firm when we are in a beautiful rage. Don’t run from our fury—after all it might contain magical wisdom. In the gale force of feminine anger, your calm is a powerful reminder that we are met and accepted by our beloved partner.

8. Ravish your woman. Every now and then, take her wholeheartedly, without apology. Press her against a wall and bind her with your kisses. Possess your goddess, oh great god that you are, and then let her possess you. Polarity is a potent nectar and the current runs both ways.

9. Slay your demons. We all have them, the dark part of our hearts, the crevices where our fear and loathing hideout. Notice what keeps you awake at night and stalk it. Hunt your darkness and drag it into the light for loving and healing.

10. Leave your mark. Don’t settle for a fleeting cameo in which your appearance in this kingdom is so quickly forgotten. What do you want your children to say about you? Your great-grandchildren? The greatest legacy is not the wealth you leave behind, but your heartfelt message that echoes forward to future generations.

Ultimately, this dance of the divine in both genders is not about lighting incense, chanting at kirtan, wearing white or even gathering in gender-specific goddess groups or men’s Iron John style movements designed to reclaim a lost chest-thumping masculine. Rather, it’s about being real 360-degree humans, embracing both the sacred and the mundane within ourselves and each other.

When men are willing to meet women heart-first and to live from that divine place of kingly wisdom, warrior courage and boy-like vulnerability, we women are given the gift of receiving all of you. And we are given permission to reveal all of who we are—the nurturing goddess, the juicy seductress and yes, even the nasty b*tch.

In the end, the call to a Divine Feminine and Sacred Masculine is perhaps just the simple yearning to get out of our crazy-busy heads and into our still-knowing hearts. As Rumi says, “I looked in Temples, Churches and Mosques. I found the Divine in my heart.”

Whatever the divine really is, let’s find it together.


The qualities to look for in a partner:

Letting Go is Overrated.


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About Lori Ann Lothian

Lori Ann Lothian is a spiritual revolutionary, divine magic maker and all-purpose scribe. Her articles on love, relationships, enlightenment and sex have appeared at Huffington Post, Good Men Project, Yoganonymous, Origin magazine, Better After 50, XO Jane and on her hit personal blog The Awakened Dreamer. She is also the creator of The 40 Day Magic Challenge. a daily practice to create a masterpiece life of ease, flow, joy and prosperity. Lori Ann lives in Vancouver, Canada, with her husband and daughter, where she has learned to transcend the rain and surrender to mega doses of vitamin D. Tweet her at Twitter


216 Responses to “A Call to the Sacred Masculine: Ten Daring Invitations from the Divine Feminine.”

  1. michele says:

    absolutely love this…so many men think the strong, goddess figure wants to compete for power, even overshadow men's strength, when what most want is a man who taps into his strength just as strongly – one who meets her feminine with his masculine, and who celebrates and honors each of them.

  2. Chanda says:

    I am saving this for my son, and if there is a partner in my future, he will need this. THANK YOU!

  3. Lori Ann : your comments are helpful to provoke action from both genders but your terms and language bespeak a merely journalistic viewpoint. "Is that all you got?"

    Comments by e.b. sarver here says what I think you would profit to absorb more personally and/or more deeply.
    Also read Gary Stamper's 2012 book, "Awakening the New Masculine."

    Rasing consciousness take work and time, practice and devotion, a lot more than a "10-tips" list

  4. Soulriser says:

    While I can connect emotionally with the sentiment of this article, there's still something that feels off. Still something Hollywood dreamy-cheesy about it. The ideal man as something in accordance with some fanciful rules of perfection that still seem tied to bullshit ideals promulgated by New Age-hippie exceptionalists. Like the so called "goddess propagandists," it smells of being self righteous and trite.

    But yes, of course, men need to change, as many of us have swung too far towards the opposite of Marlboro Man to be of much use to the world. So may we be inspired to grow into giants perfected by our trials.

  5. Csilla says:

    I totally agree with what you said here. Men have it very hard these days.

  6. Lori Ann, Thank you. I have so much to say, I wanted to write to you personally, but I couldn't figure out how. So here is the abbreviated version.

    I am participating in a 7 week on online course by a bestselling author. Her book takes a beautiful, riveting, in-depth look at the qualities needed to attract a man or women of the highest masculine and feminine attributes. In essence, the book rallies the reader to cultivate the qualities ourselves we are looking for in a partner. Brilliant right?

    Well here's the catch. There are perhaps over 500 people enrolled in the course. And as I scrolled down the pictures to see who my course buddies where, to my great heartache, I noticed there were only 12 men.

    After sitting with that discouraging statistic for a few minutes, I threw up my hands to the heavens and called to the divine: "So what, all these beautiful woman are preparing themselves for their amazing man, and when we're done; What? You're gonna' beam all the men down on a mother ship from some other planet where they’re preparing themselves for us?"

    Once I began to laugh at my own ranting, I had fun imagining these men of the highest masculine attributes marching out, one by one into the arms of those 500+ goddess women anxiously waiting and well prepared for their beloved.
    And now not so cynically, (and since the odds of meeting a man who has already taken the time to truly prepare himself to be a man of the highest attributes seems to be about 50-1) my hope is that all the women who have worked, labored to stretch into the divine feminine of the highest attributes will meet men who are at least willing to take these goddesses by the hand and allow themselves to be influenced and encouraged by our diligent work.

  7. Tim Britton says:

    Provocative, yes… You could easily have pointed at "chest thumping" without utterly mischaracterize the Iron John myth, Bly's work, and the entire neo men's movement, though even then, I'm not sure why you would see the need. Sounds like you ought to know better… do you? If not, you might want to look into it… not mention looking into yourself to see why you feel the need to throw salt in the wound… and yes, we men are struggling enough without women adding insult to injury… aside from all that, I welcome and embrace the perennial process of healing, both in men's groups and in relationship with women, as well as in the dark well of solitude…

  8. Jason W says:

    I'm kind of curious about number 7. Stand firm in what way? Not by taking abuse from a woman, and standing idly by. That's not some ideal to be followed by men. Or do you mean stand firm while the other goes into a rage because they're not getting their way? In either case it sounds really juvenile. Hopefully someone can help clarify this for me.

  9. Victor says:

    And it makes me happy that so many man are connected with each other, with them selves, with their families and with their partners. What you CAN do is to go towards them and tell them how much you admire that and value it. Tell them how great of a job they are doing and don't just tell them; show it to them with your whole being. Make them understand that they are on the right track.
    If no woman liked man with toys, man would not have toys.
    Often women complain about men but then they go and hang out with exactly the kind of men that behave poorly…

  10. Meilin says:

    Continuing to speak the language of masculine and feminine, whether divine or not, and whether referring to males and females or to archetypes supposedly within us all is hardly revolutionary. In fact, it's not revolutionary at all – it's archaic and conservative. This kind of binary thinking is unimaginative and, worse, it perniciously (even if subtly) perpetuates the very gender norms it supposedly transcends. More hunter/warrior and nurturer/seductress b.s. that prevents people from being "360 degrees" rather than cultivating it.

  11. Kamyar says:

    Hi Lori! Thanks for sharing these words. A sweet friend of mine directed my attention to it.
    I believe words such as Men, Women, Masculine, Feminine, Divine… like almost any other word have a mirror quality. The meanings, fears and hopes we charge them with are reflections of our inner longings. Yes they are about beings out there, and yes, they are also about our selves.
    As a man and through experience I have learned that there are Gods and Goddesses in every man and woman, as perfect as they can be in every situation. Moments that I had a desire for them to be even a bit more that what they are, if I had the courage to step back and observe myself in that desire, it was easy to recognise that there is a potential in myself that is longing to come online and be claimed. The person in front of me was a perfect as it could be, in that moment.
    I also see a longing in women to connect to their inner masculine in a different way, and the same with men, to acknowledge their inner feminine.
    Thanks again for the inspiration… With Smiles

  12. Angela says:

    "Organizing a spiritual revolution as women without inviting men to the front lines with us means we are orchestrating a collective reframe with only half the available power." This wonderful article could have ended there and the message would have been loud and clear. I love men. I'm so tired of the manosphere/feminist banter. Although the way men are described above is a bit to broad to be credible, I do believe they need to be loved, and women need to stop punishing them at every turn. The real, heroic men will find their goddessses who deserve them. The women who believe their "goddesses" just because their female still have a lot to learn. <3

  13. macpanther says:

    Have you read Iron John?

  14. Lindsay says:

    Thank you for your honest sharing, Lars. I am happy for the work you have been doing and for your journey to wholeness. I am seeking examples as well as guidance as a woman on how to encourage and support men on this journey. I really appreciate this article and all the comments.

  15. A complete New World Order reordering of traditional, cultural gender roles. The men described above could be 16 years of age, or perhaps homosexual men. Certainly not independent, free-thinking, individual American men who do not put themselves under women's feet, which is what is taught in universities in the US today.
    Most of the above is new age mind-control, seasoned with fantasy novel gods, goddesses, fairies, elves, heroes and heroines. College-educated women are taught to fear men, compete with men, and to despise traditional heterosexual men. Third wave feminism has turned women against men. All the sex between men and women in the world won't change that.

  16. Ben Broughton says:


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