April 17, 2013

Do Women Want Sex More than Men?

A girlfriend of mine caught me by surprise the other day while we were sitting at lunch.

The conversation started out of nowhere when she began to express to me that she has no desire to ever marry.  She indicated the only thing she really needs from a man is sex, and that she doesn’t find ultimate fulfillment in relationships.

She wants a boy toy in every port, and does not want any man telling her what she can or can’t do.

She’s my fierce, renegade friend, who I find utterly amusing.

My jaw dropped as she was talking. I had no idea that she was like this, or thought like this, but I couldn’t help but laugh and enjoy the conversation as she continually cracked me up. Instead of droning on about finding that special guy or lamenting over the fact that she is not married and well into her 30s, it was exactly the opposite of most conversations women have.

Then she turned to me and asked, When did women start wanting sex more than men?”

I don’t even pretend to have the answers, but I thought this topic was worthy enough to share. It has long been believed that men want and need sex more than women, but when it boils down to it, this isn’t always true. Sexual needs and wants really depends on the individual. We all have different sexual appetites and different desires for how often we want sex.

At the end of our conversation (I couldn’t stop smiling) I told my friend, “Well, honey, you are going to have to find a man with a sexual appetite to match yours.”

She laughed and responded. “I swear, one man will never be enough for me.” And she was dead serious.

You may think she is crazy but I swear she is not.  This woman is just speaking her truth.  But I’d love to hear your thoughts on the subject.  How much sex is too much?  Not enough?  Should we settle down?  If not, why not?  Please leave your comments below.

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Ed: Kate Bartolotta

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Cominin2 Oct 16, 2015 5:07pm

I just saw this article and have to respond! I am a 45 year old woman married once for about 3 years at the age of 41-44 and divorced because he simply was not who he portrayed himself to be. But we didn't have sex more than 30 times the whole marriage! I have always liked sex but never felt completely comfortable to relax and let go. But after my failed marriage, and I swear it has something to do with my hormones, I am a complete horn dog!! I can not get enough! I have had a 35 year old boyfriend not be able to give me enough. Now I am with my love who will be 43 soon and we have sex everyday and I mean EVERYDAY! We have missed in the past 4 months maybe 2 days. We actually kept track and checked in the Guiness World Records and we beat the record of 102 I believe. If only we would have known before hand that our chemistry was so right on that we would willingly throw down on each other nightly. And not only that, we have had morning sex as well almost every morning. I am the one who cant get enough. He is willing but has complained of being tired and I tired or not am there for lovin! It helps me sleep better, less body aches, have a better attitude, gives me energy the next day. I can really say nothing bad about it. I am convinced that most women do want sex more than men if its good sex and they want to be there. If they are complaining chances are there is something wrong with the relationship.

Terri Sep 19, 2015 7:08am

I feel the same as this women!

Carmen Jul 11, 2015 8:10am

My close friend is a woman in her mid fiftys who cannot get enough! She is a very beautiful , trim woman with the strongest sex drive I ever heard of. She often has sex with men who are 25 and 30 years younger, sometimes twice a day! There seems to never be a shortage of young men who desire older women like her. She contends that men closer to her age cannot keep up but the younger guys are great. I have never encountered any other woman like her! Her guys sleep over a couple times a week! Does she have a hormone imbalance?

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Hayley Hobson

Hayley Hobson is an author, speaker, business coach, yogi, Pilates and holistic nutritional expert based in Boulder, CO. Hayley creates lifestyle transformations by coaching her clients to strengthen, nourish and evolve through the cycles and shifts in life. Combining cutting edge understanding in all three disciplines due to years of anatomical study and dietary theory, Hayley’s approach leverages their blended benefits and results. Her unique and intelligent style promotes strengthening while softening–empowering her client’s to heal not only their physical bodies, but their hearts and minds as well. Hayley studied at the Institute for Integrative Nutrition, continues her studies with David Wolfe, raw food expert and is an essential oil expert in her own right.  Her insights and articles can also be found on her blog, Mindbodygreen and Islaorganics. She has also been featured in Pilates Style magazine, Natural Health magazine and Triathlete Magazine.  She has fun running and playing in the mountains with her husband, former world-ranked triathlete, Wes Hobson and their two beautiful daughters, Makenna and Madeline. To learn more about her nutritional courses, events she’s hosting and custom programs go to her website or follow her on Facebook or Twitter or Pinterest.