May 27, 2014

Why More Women Would Succeed if they Collaborated Instead of Competed.

women cat compete glasses girls

Let’s have a quick chat here: we all know that being vulnerable and being open with our true feelings and our emotions is not always an easy thing to do.

So instead, because it’s much easier, we bottle up our feelings and our thoughts. Think about when we have a message to share with the world that would transform people’s lives—and then we see someone else rocking out a similar message. How would we feel about that?

Vulnerability is such a powerful tool and it can exist in an objective form as both good and bad. Good, because when we embrace and expose our vulnerable depths, we shine more, just as diamonds do before they become that bright, shining stone. Vulnerability can be bad when we tuck it in under the rug and pretend that it doesn’t exist, and because it keeps us from truly shining in that moment.

We women are beautiful creatures; we are smart and highly intuitive, and let’s add creative to that mix. We know what we want, we can sense when someone else possesses what we want, so we roar. Roaring by itself is part of our innate feminine power, so natural because we have received it as a gift of femininity. How we choose to roar is the question to ask.

We can roar out of desperation, out of excitement, love, anger, uncertainty, out of inspiration and so on. We can also roar in silence in the form of jealousy, envy, malice and hate—and that is when vulnerability is bad.

When we are jealous of another woman rocking our message, that jealousy is a form of roaring and is negative vulnerability; that kind of vulnerability is draining, weakening, exhausting and success-delaying.

We all share an amplified degree of connectedness, which is why some woman will already be rocking the type of job we desire, or the message we have to share, or the book we thought about writing, or the type of relationship we crave, or the business we created a vision board for, or the jet set lifestyle we are working daily toward…the list could go on.

So let’s tie this message all together.

Vulnerability can be positive or negative.

Positive vulnerability:

>> We allow ourselves to feel what we’re feeling and consciously guide ourselves to understand the why behind our feelings.

>> We accept our feelings at that time and decide to use them as stepping stones for moving forward, so we seek out to share our vulnerable sides, we put ourselves out there even if there’s a greater chance that rejection might occur and we view it as part of the story.

Negative vulnerability:

>> We stay consumed by the feelings and let them eat us up.

>> We let our egos rule on our behalf.

>> We allow pride to walk in place of selflessness.

>> We battle within ourselves between asking for help or dying in silence.

>> We justify our feelings by rationalizing our negative thoughts, especially about another person.

>> We find faults in another’s way of rocking their gifts, we criticize and condemn instead of approaching from a place of love and positive feedback.

Roaring: a form of expressing how we feel.

Active Roaring:

>> Excitement to reach out.

>> We are inspired to learn, to inquire, so we request mentorship, coaching, and we send out friend requests to other women who are rocking it. Instead of allowing negative anger to surface, we choose them as our mentors, and learn from them officially or unofficially. We even email collaboration proposals.

Silent Roaring:

>> Jealousy, envy, gossip and malice.

>> We see their lovely posts and refuse to click “like.”

>> We judge from afar.

>> We mock when they stumble, we compare, we waste quality living just to stay in competition.

Solution: choose positive vulnerability. Choose active roaring, and finally, let go of the competition. Embrace collaboration, as it will create a thriving environment for you and her, and will lead to ultimate success.

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Editor: Catherine Monkman

Photo: Kikasso/Flickr

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