Nine hallmarks of the living, breathing tantric woman.
Have you noticed the word Tantra is all around, yet so few people actually even get what that means?
I write this as I find that I am hell bent on demystifying Tantra, and bringing it back home in a way that resonates with you, in a way that empowers you.
Do you, like so many other women have this fancy idea about what Tantra is? Like it is something you need to acquire lots of super duper skills for, or just something weird and extreme that has nothing to do with who you naturally are?
The word Tantra essentially means to weave.
To weave is to unite, it is to welcome and love all aspects of ourselves, it is to engage with our everyday lives as a deeply intimate spiritual experience.
Tantra is one of the few spiritual traditions that honor the sacred feminine as the great teacher.
In a world where so many women feel shame about their bodies that stem from negative religious conditioning, Tantra shows us how to honor and accept and embrace our bodies as they are and embrace our sexuality as sacred.
Traditionally, a tantric goddess is a symbol of divinity that we can connect to in order to activate certain qualities in ourselves. For example, if you need to let go of something that no longer serves you, you can invoke the qualities of kali ma, the ferocious goddess, to help you remember your own ability to make empowered choices.
So the tantric goddess can be evoked, and she can also be lived. You can be a living, breathing tantric goddess through devoting yourself to the path of becoming a more free, integrated and activated expression of yourself and your deepest truth.
To call up the tantric goddess within us is to invoke and embrace our divine nature and come into our power as a sacred sensual woman.
So read on to learn about the hallmarks of a living breathing tantric goddess You may already embody these qualities and if not… this is an invitation to step up and dive in to your innate potential as a living, breathing tantric goddess.
1. She feels energy.
The tantric woman is connected to the source of life force energy, she seeks to maintain an awareness of her body and the subtle energy moving through her at all times.
She maintains her connection with the earth and sky, and her body as a channel between the two. She seeks to harmonize with the natural flow and cycles of life and listens to nature and her internal compass for her cues.
She is dedicated to keeping herself in a state of fullness through cultivating, gathering, building, sharing and storing life force energy.
The Tao Tantric arts is one way to do this, so is yoga and meditation—whatever helps you to stay sensitive and topped up with vital energy helps you to feel like a goddess and embrace life in its fullness.
2. She is an explorer
When you bump up against a challenge what do you do?
The tantrika may be subject to the odd freak out, but ultimately she is on a voyage of discovery, she is doing her best to learn, to expand, and to find new paths to freedom and acceptance.
She uses the experiences in her everyday life to get more intimate with her inner landscape.
Her body is her temple.
Challenges are her food for learning.
Relationship is utilized consciously as a vehicle for deeper understanding.
When her “stuff” comes up she looks at it rather than running away from it or hiding from it.
3. She dives in to feeling
She is not afraid to feel. In fact her dharma (her life’s purpose) is to feel.
She is whole-heartedly dedicated to the truth, the kind of truth she can feel in her womb, her heart and her whole body.
She is honoring her subtle feelings as messages from her deep self.
She lets anger, rage, joy and desire move through her body freely—she sighs, roars, groans, yawns, whimpers— whatever is needed, whatever feels right.
All the while she is honing her bullshit detector. She tunes in, she feels, she flows, she does not lose herself in the movement.
4. She is devoted to life
This path takes dedication girlfriend! The tantric explorer does the work needed to continually heal and open and thrive.
She nourishes herself, gets wild, self soothes, she listens in to what is needed to stay present and keep feeling and keep opening, even when everything in her wants to hide in old patterns of blaming, numbing out, running away.
She is devoted to her own healing and the healing of the world, she is devoted to life and she is devoted to love.
Her dedication and devotion is prayer in motion, through opening and softening and feeling she says yes to life.
5. She is exposed and real.
She is listening deeply to how life is expressing itself in her body right now and is devoted to the authentic expression of that.
If there is any quest that she is on, it’s to be real.
She is both strong and transparent. She is not afraid to express her vulnerability. She lets herself break open and be exposed and seen.
She speaks her truth as she feels it; she gives herself time and space to find her clarity.
She seeks to embrace her many magnificent imperfections and share her truth with courage.
6. She stands in her Shakti power
In short, she is not holding back. She is not staying small.
She does not apologize for being herself.
She knows her worth; she does not sell herself out to be accepted.
She refuses to play pointless power games or let someone else belittle her—she sits on her throne, and if she falls off, she gets up, wipes off the debris, realigns and gets back on.
7. She is sexually activated.
She is sexually active even when she is not in relationship.
She uses her sexual energy as a power source, enabling her to create and express and flourish.
She vibrates on her own personal volcano of feminine sexual power, she engages with her sexual energy, growing it, tempering it, channeling it into creative living and acts of love.
She does not leak her energy all over the shop, she is wise and discerning about who she shares energy with.
She is healing her sexual wounds and thriving on her own wild energy, she lets life excite her, she celebrates beauty and feeling, she touches herself, she is self sustaining, she feels comfortable in her own skin.
When the time is right she loves to share the journey with conscious men who can hold her Shakti power and love her as she is.
8. She creates sisterhood
She knows the worth of sisterhood. She does not compare herself to her sisters, she seeks to empower her sisters and be empowered by them, to learn from them, to share with them.
She does not buy the idea that we are in competition with each other, she uses sister love and support as a valuable resource on her path.
9. She consecrates.
She can feel that there is something so much bigger than herself, of which she is a vital part.
She might call it Ma/spirit/ god/life, or not even speak a word about it, yet she feels it, she is plugged in, she is filling up constantly on this connection and she allows this connection to hold and support her when things are going well—and when things are not.
She know she is working for “the mother” of all, whether she utters the word goddess or not…. she consecrates her actions and achievement to the highest possible consciousness.
She walks boldly in the direction of her souls calling as an offering to life, to herself, to what she feels to be sacred.
Is this you?
I hope so, because life needs us!
The world needs women who have claimed their goddess selves. I work with women from all over the world sharing Tantric skills for empowerment and I witness a collective awakening to a power that comes from deep inside and is nurtured by our connection to the earth and each other.
We must do this together!
When we walk together then the path is easier, sprinkled with collective sighs of pleasure, mutual releases and abundant support.
I hope this has inspired you, to explore, to feel, to flow, to love, to embrace yourself, to claim your life as sacred and be the goddess that you are.
Love elephant and want to go steady?
Editor: Emily Bartran
Photo: Author’s Own