When we screw up in our marriage or relationship, what do we do?
When working through conflict, does saying “I’m sorry” really work?
In my experience, no. Most of the time it is used as a way to “hurry up” and move on because the person who is “sorry” is probably also feeling bad, guilty or shameful and they want to quickly move away from those feelings.
Sure, there is a place for a genuine apology, but I don’t recommend any apology until you’ve first acknowledged where you messed up or caused harm.
See what most people say in this video:
As you can see, a true repair isn’t just about an apology. It’s about helping the other person see that we also see what we did or did not do.
Give it a shot in your relationship and leave a comment below if you notice a shift.
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Editor: Catherine Monkman
Photo: Stephen Brace/Flickr