7 Things Happy People Do Differently.

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You'd smile, too, if you just got a job after being unemployed for the last six months!

What I know about happiness is this: happy people do things differently.

There are billions of people on our planet and clearly, some are truly happy. The rest of us bounce back and forth between happiness and well, unhappiness depending on the day.

According to Psychology Today, University of California researcher Sonja Lyubomirsky states: “40% of our of our capacity for happiness is within our power to change.

Throughout the years I’ve learned there are certain traits and habits happy people seem to have mastered. But before diving in with you, let me preface this and say:

We all have bad days, even weeks—myself included—when we fall down in all seven areas. None of us are perfect and messing up once in a while doesn’t mean we’re destined for a gloomy life.  

The difference between a happy and unhappy life is how often and how long we stay there.

Here are the seven qualities of happy people.

1. Their default belief is that if their life isn’t good, they can change it.

Happy people know life can be hard and tend to bounce through hard times with an attitude of curiosity versus victimhood. They take responsibility for how they got themselves into a mess, and focus on getting themselves out of it as soon as possible.

Perseverance towards problems versus complaining over circumstances is a symptom of a happy person. Unhappy people see themselves as victims of life and stay stuck in the “look what happened to me” attitude versus finding a way through and out the other side.

2. They believe most people can be trusted.

I won’t argue that healthy discernment is important, but most happy people are trusting of their fellow man. They believe in the good in people, versus assuming everyone is out to get them. Generally open and friendly towards people they meet, happy people foster a sense of community around themselves and meet new people with an open heart.

Unhappy people are distrustful of most people they meet and assume that strangers can’t be trusted. Unfortunately this behavior slowly starts to close the door on any connection outside of an inner-circle and thwarts all chances of meeting new friends.

3. They concentrate on what’s right in this world versus what’s wrong.

There’s plenty wrong with this world, no arguments here, yet unhappy people turn a blind eye to what’s actually right in this world and instead focus on what’s wrong. You can spot them a mile away, they’ll be the ones complaining and responding to any positive attributes of our world with, “Yeah, but…”

Happy people are aware of global issues, but balance their concern with also seeing what’s right. I like to call this keeping both eyes open. Unhappy people tend to close one eye towards anything good in this world in fear they might be distracted from what’s wrong. Happy people keep it in perspective. They know our world has problems and they also keep an eye on what’s right.

4. They don’t compare themselves to others or harbor jealousy.

Unhappy people believe someone else’s good fortune steals from their own. They believe there’s not enough goodness to go around and constantly compare yours against theirs. This leads to jealousy and resentment.

Happy people know that your good luck and circumstance are merely signs of what they too can aspire to achieve. Happy people believe they carry a unique blueprint that can’t be duplicated or stolen from—by anyone on the planet. They believe in unlimited possibilities and don’t get bogged down by thinking one person’s good fortune limits their possible outcome in life.

5. They stop striving to control their life.

There’s a difference between control and striving to achieve our goals. Happy people take steps daily to achieve their goals, but realize in the end, there’s very little control over what life throws their way.

Unhappy people tend to micromanage in effort to control all outcomes and fall apart in dramatic display when life throws a wrench in their plan. Happy people can be just as focused, yet still have the ability to go with the flow and not melt down when life delivers a curve-ball.

The key here is to be goal-oriented and focused, but allow room for letting sh*t happen without falling apart when the best laid plans go awry—because they will. Going with the flow is what happy people have as Plan B.

6 They refuse to consider their future with worry and fear.

There’s only so much rent space between your ears. Unhappy people fill their thoughts with what could go wrong versus what might go right.

Happy people take on a healthy dose of delusion and allow themselves to daydream about what they’d like to have life unfold for them. Unhappy people fill that head space with constant worry and fear.

Happy people experience fear and worry, but make an important distinction between feeling it and living it. When fear or worry crosses a happy person’s mind, they’ll ask themselves if there’s an action they can be taken to prevent their fear or worry from happening (there’s responsibility again) and they take it. If not, they realize they’re spinning in fear and they lay it down.

7. They walk away from gossip and complaining.

Unhappy people like to live in the past. What’s happened to them and life’s hardships are their conversation of choice. When they run out of things to say, they’ll turn to other people’s lives and gossip.

Happy people live in the now and dream about the future. You can feel their positive vibe from across the room. They’re excited about something they’re working on, grateful for what they have and dreaming about the possibilities of life.

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Obviously none of us are perfect. We’re all going to swim in negative waters once in a while, but what matters is how long we stay there and how quickly we work to get ourselves out. Practicing positive habits daily is what sets happy people apart from unhappy people, not doing everything perfectly.

Walk, fall down, get back up again, repeat. It’s in the getting back up again that all the difference resides.

 Adapted with permission from original post Daily Transformations

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Author: Tamara Star

Editor: Travis May

Photo: Wikipedia

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Tamara Star

Tamara Star believes happiness is not an end destination, but instead the ability to see the ordinary through eyes of wonder. Want her free tips and tricks for health, happiness and love? Click here. Receive her free 3 video series for clearing the slate for more love & happiness. Click here. She's an international best-selling author and the creator of the original 40-day Personal reboot program for women--a 6 week virtual deep dive into clearing the slate on what's blocking you. Registration is open NOW here. Tamara's global reach inspires women around the world through her programs, newsletters, and teachings. She's been featured on SiriusXM radio, Good Morning America, former Oprah producer LeGrande Green's GetBOLD radio, Dr. Brenda Wade's GoodLove Radio, Daybreak USA and News Australia. Connect with Tamara on her websiteFacebook or Twitter. Tamara's work had been translated into 6 languages and featured on The Huffington Post, MindBodyGreen, Positively Positive, Yahoo News, The News.com Australia, The Good Men Project, and Yoga Anonymous.

Comments

One Response to “7 Things Happy People Do Differently.”

  1. RafalMichealGabriel says:

    The tension between points One and Five is interesting to me i.e. happy people can change their life…… without striving to control their life." The points together appears as an absurd self-contradictory idea but in some reality expresses a possible truth…

    Yoga, whether in the fulcrum of an asana or the in silent contemplation of meditation expresses this beautiful paradox. The puzzle of will, desire and effort. To do without doing.

    Sometimes, something as simple as a morning forward bend expresses this play. One wants to touch ones toes. Propelling ones self forcefully forward gets you some way, but the tension limits the pose. Alternatively relaxing by letting go forward also gets you some of the way there, but the lack of direction also limits the pose. The trick is of course is to do both at the same time i.e. relax forward and try to gently extend down.

    We learn to balance the desire to reach the goal with the will to learn how to realize it's goal. The effort produced by desire is not enough to achieve an aim. Or as Slavoj Žižek puts it "desire's raison d'être is not to realize its goal, to find full satisfaction, but to reproduce itself as desire."

    In the spirit of beautiful paradoxes may I add one more paradox to your lovely happy people list:
    – Happy people have low expectations but high hope.

    thanks for the article
    paxx .r

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