It’s eight o’ clock on a Friday night and I’m at the office, fussing over email syntax.

“Sorry, C,” I sigh to my assistant, “I know this is picky.”

“No, no,” she waves me off. “Love is in the details.”

I stop short.

“What?  What did you say?”

“Love is in the details,” she repeats and shrugs.

I fumble over to my keyboard, “Hold the phones. You are brilliant. I’m writing that one down.”

Love is in the details.

When I love someone, I don’t love them in generalities. I love someone for their idiosyncrasies, vulnerabilities, quirky beauty and oddball habits. I love my sister for her fast patter speech and cute snores. I love my Gram for her determined self-reliance when she fights me for the dinner check. I love my mother for her unrestrained passion for elephants. My Dad for his enthusiasm for terrible movies (“They’re so bad they’re good!” we chortle).

Perfection doesn’t move me. Though I may admire it, my heart is not touched by your impressive salary or your perfect hair. I will love you for your tragic flaws, your earnest mistakes, and your late night confessions. I love you for the same things that will make me crazy. Your beautiful humanity. Your ridiculous quirks.

“There is a crack in everything. That’s how the light gets in.” ~ Leonard Cohen

We don’t love in generalizations, and we don’t show love that way either.

We can’t.

We reveal the immensity of our love through our tiny, everyday choices. Like when we pick up the flavour ice cream that they like, send the birthday text, and wash the dishes, even though it wasn’t our turn. We show love when we recycle the bottle, buy organic, and bring our own bags to Whole Foods. Or when we fuss over an email after work on Friday night.

Love isn’t a grand gesture, a grandiose movie script, or a backlit kiss on a perfect beach.

Love is the fine print.

And each detail is a keyhole to magnificence.

 

Love elephant and want to go steady?

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Author: Rachel Scott 

Editor: Renée Picard

Image: abhi_ryan at Flickr