Comedian Amy Schumer has never been shy about saying what’s on her mind.
However, it’s what she said about in the August 2015 issue of the magazine that resonated with me the most:
“Men can look like whatever and still date a supermodel…I have a belly. And I have cellulite. And I still deserve love. And to catch the old D. And to not apologize.”
Well said, Ms. Schumer.
As a woman, I can relate to this for I, like many women, have believed for most of life that my self-worth was largely dependent on how I look.
Growing up, I didn’t fit the typical norm of Western beauty. In a culture that defined the All-American girl as tall, tanned and blonde, I was short, pale and dark. Despite never having had a weight problem, I wasn’t exactly “toned” either or at least no where near the ideal that peered out at me from the pages of Seventeen magazine or magazines like Glamour. (It never occurred to me back then that those images could have been altered.)
I can recall the first guy I ever dated in high school remarking that on a scale from one to 10, I was “barely a five.” It didn’t matter that this man was a good 15 lbs or so overweight and not attractive by anyone’s standards—I took what he said to heart. I also never questioned why it was okay for him to lust after cheerleaders and model-types or why that wasn’t called out as unattainable, whereas the mere idea of him thinking that I was above a “five” was okay.
I wish I could say the above was an isolated incident, but it was not.
While I never had anyone put it quite so rudely as that particular individual did, I did encounter others who made remarks along those lines. Even if they weren’t directed at me but at other people, the message was still clear: in order to be seen as desirable/lovable/sexy, a woman has to look a certain way.
Therefore, it is helpful to hear Amy Schumer’s words and hear them come from someone who looks like her. While I think she’s a lovely-looking woman, she is the first to point out she is hardly an object of desire by Hollywood standards. At a self-proclaimed “160 lbs,” her body type is virtually never seen among leading ladies. (While there are larger actresses in show business, they are overwhelmingly cast as the best friends, the sidekicks, or the funny ones.)
In all fairness, other actresses have made body positive comments, but few of them carry the sort of weight that Schumer’s do. For instance, when I came across a quote a few years ago by the then 37-year-old Penelope Cruz about how she intended to grow old gracefully, I had to laugh. I don’t doubt her sincerity, but hearing this from a woman who was yet to be old was kind of funny. It doesn’t mean she can’t be sincere, but it’s different when someone who has walked the walk comments.
In Schumer’s case, she clearly has walked the walk as well as talked the talk. She’s not talking about if she has extra weight on her belly: she has it and she is beautiful and she is absolutely correct in her quote.
Therefore, the next time any of us feel our self worth is attached to how we or others perceive our looks, we’d do well to remember her words of wisdom.
Updated: Amy Schumer’s Instagram post.
Relephant Read:
We (Don’t) Need Make-up: Amy Schumer Hits it Again.
Author: Kimberly Lo
Editor: Catherine Monkman
Photo: Youtube Screenshot
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