“Never cut a tree down in the wintertime. Never make a negative decision in the low time. Never make your most important decisions when you are in your worst moods. Wait. Be patient. The storm will pass. The spring will come.” ~ Robert H. Schuller
New Year’s resolutions never hold that much juice for me. In the short dark days of winter I’m still hibernating, enjoying the quiet dawdling of time, I’m not yet dreaming of bursting forth through the dark earth.
But by spring equinox the whole world seems different—the sun holds more charge, the birds return to their morning serenades, the trees and flowers scent the air, despite everything they’ve been through. This is the energy of change. This is the energy of transformation and revolution. (Resolution sounds so boring anyway… I would rather grow.)
So in the spirit of springtime transformation, I would like to share a simple yet effective tool for identifying the areas in one’s life that are most in need of magic and the fairy dust that can bring it to fruition in your life.
There is great power in our mind. A great power to create through our dreams and visions. However, sometimes we find ourselves enmeshed in the life we are living. It can be difficult to hear the quiet song of your heart when you are hearing the phone ring, the baby crying, the email landing in your inbox. And in addition, I often found my attempts at envisioning my future were confounded by a fear of failing. If I dreamed big… my disappointment might also be big. So when springtime gently asks me to tap into what I’d like to bring forth into my life, I have to trick myself.
This method came to me several years ago from a wise friend. I never knew the name, so I simply call it the Don’t Want/Do Want List.
The theory is simple: your words—written first on paper, and then on your heart—will create change. The things you dream do not come to you by accident, but by way of the Universe that wants to create through you. So by getting clear about what you want, you can see how quickly you find it manifesting, even in small ways, in your life.
Here’s how you do it:
Take three to four pieces of lined paper. On the top of the left side write: “I don’t want…” Draw a line down the middle of the page. At the top of the right side write: “I want…”
You can choose one topic to write about or do what I like to call the “feels” which is everything I want to feel in my life.
Now you’re ready to download.
Start with the left side. It’s important to know what you don’t want so that you can know what you do want. Write fast and hard—let your heart say whatever it feels. Don’t edit and don’t worry about repeating yourself. In fact, it will be an indicator of how important that particular area is to you and it will come in handy. Take your time and keep writing until you feel you’ve exhausted the things you don’t want. Good!
You may want to set another time to come back for the next part when you are feeling fresh and clear. Or you may choose to use the momentum you’ve just created.
Look back to your list and next to every item that you have written, write the opposite. You don’t want to feel “in the way” at your in-laws? What would you like to feel… embraced, involved, belonging or helpful? Write it down. Don’t want to feel nervous about finances? Would you prefer to feel calm, secure, swimming in abundance? Write it down. Use short simple language that speaks to your heart and go item by item until you have your list of magic.
Now cut the paper in half, and ceremoniously dispose of the list of what you don’t want (you might burn it, shred it, bury it or just toss it in the recycle bin). What is left… is you—your desires, your wishes, your future.
This morning I strung my list together as a sort of prayer, and followed by chanting the miracle mantra (taught by the kundalini yoga guru Yogi Bhajan as the answer to prayers). I’m sharing my list below and wish for you a true alchemy in your own life as you identify the life you want.
… to feel energized, open and connected.
… to feel whole, well and vibrant.
… to feel my strength and flexibility—to be in the flow.
… to feel ease throughout my day and to know that I am enough.
… to forgive and to love and to accept where I am.
… to feel abundant security.
… to shine.
… to feel free.
… to love what I do and to feel the strength of my competence.
… to honor my solitude and my practice.
… to feel bright and alive, rested and ready.
… to know my worth.
… to love big, to love with my truth and to know it is enough.
… to love and bless every one and to serve others as if it is a superpower.
… to swim through life—mobile, fluid, smiling.
… to care what my soul feels so much more than what others think.
… to love the ride.
… to remember that my body is temporary but is the only one I get this go-round.
… to lift others to their souls.
… to travel, expand and dance… often!
… to live big.
… to love big.
… to feel my aliveness.
… to use every drop of energy to beam.
Springtime—it’s the start of a new year, may you love all of it.
Author: Brandy Kolmer
Editor: Katarina Tavčar
Photo: Calum MacAulay/Unsplash