My heart was once broken so badly that my entire world came crumbling down.
All of the worth I had felt so connected to seemed to vanish from my life. In time, I would have tiny glimpses of truth, and during that time I wrote myself a letter to remind myself of who I really am. When we’re in our deepest times of grief it can feel like we’ll never have relief. If you’re in this place of grief, I hope this letter will lift your spirits the way it did mine. I hope this letter gives you the strength to empower yourself in the moments when that reality feels impossible.
When you are in the darkness of despair remember this:
In the times when you feel the darkness swallowing you,
I want to remind you of the truth.
Not words that will help you hide your pain,
because your broken heart requires you to feel this,
but the truth.
And the truth, my love, is this—
You are my love.
Not his love or her love.
You are my responsibility.
For taking care.
For giving you what no one else can.
You are mine.
Another’s feelings about you has no relationship to your value.
Your value is intrinsic within you.
No one can touch it, taint it or diminish it.
Your pain and your fears do not make you unlovable,
They make you human.
You are worthy of being human, and as such, of being flawed.
You are worthy of love even on your darkest days.
You are worthy of being held, of being seen and of being heard.
You are worthy of this truth.
You are a giver, my dear.
No measure of heartbreak will ever close your heart.
You don’t know how to give small pieces of your heart, saving the rest for your safety.
You give it all.
And you are a fuller human for having given it all away
Because you know the truth is that it’s unlimited.
You are a giver and also a forgiver.
You know that holding on to someone else’s pain will only hold you down.
You will always forgive others.
But you must also forgive yourself.
You must also let it be ok that you didn’t do all the right things.
You must know that your imperfections are part of what makes you beautifully human,
You must allow them to be okay to be seen.
And when another person can’t see you,
And can’t hold space for you,
You must be willing to let them go.
Your pain is a reflection of your love.
You have loved so deeply,
that your heart now grieves.
And that’s beautiful
Because you have loved more deeply than you ever have before,
And that is something you can be proud of.
And when your heart cries in pain,
When there is no one there to hold you,
You are never alone.
I am always here.
Author: Michelle D’Avella
Editor: Yoli Ramazzina
Photo: Flickr/Anil kumar