“Unless it’s mad, passionate, extraordinary love, it’s a waste of your time. There are too many mediocre things in life; love shouldn’t be one of them.” ~ Dreams for an Insomniac.
Sure, there are countless men who could come into my universe and leave me feeling like their love is good enough—but that’s not what I’m after.
These men may say and do the right thing. They might shower me with roses and gifts from their travels around the world, and they might wake each morning telling me how beautiful and loved I am.
One may truly see me for myself and understand that sometimes princesses don’t fit into the glass slipper, simply because they were born a queen.
What’s troublesome to my sometimes lonely heart is that none of them matter because I am done accepting love that is only good enough when I know that what I am seeking is f*cking extraordinary.
I don’t need someone to make my life easier by occupying a space of convenience.
Perhaps there was a time when I dreamed of this easy kind of love, one that grew unnoticed along the meandering highways of life and simply provided a safe spot to land, even though we were left empty by the lack of passion.
Yet, no matter how many times I’ve tried to take the easy road, my heart just won’t let me give up on finding someone who burns with the same intensity that I do. I’ve realized that sometimes no matter how good someone seems, if they don’t light a fire inside of me, keeping me warm on my darkest days, then it’s a love that will eventually burn out.
Regardless of the difficulty of extraordinary love, it’s worth ten thousand times more than monotony that withers away my soul—for my soul knows there must be something more than just the mundane.
There are moments in life when everything changes in the blink of an eye. I’ve just realized that these instances occur each day if we are willing to keep our eyes open to what we see and feel.
I can no longer accept a love that merely satisfies me on a physical level when I know what it feels like to have my every sense heightened while playing with the energy of someone who knows how to handle fire and not get burned.
Although there may be moments of bitter disappointment and confusion so thick I sometimes don’t know which way to turn, my only option is to follow my crazy heart knowing that it will lead me precisely to where I am supposed to be.
Because I know we all have the option to settle for good enough, but when we do we sacrifice the spectacular.
We will never find an amazing love if we accept the bland taste of good enough.
Sure, a love that is good enough might leave us feeling safe and protected. It might even be exactly what we needed at one time because it gave us the borders to contain a perfectly acceptable and normal life.
But eventually these lines choke us until we are left gasping for breath, wondering how we ever fooled ourselves into living a life with mundane love.
And I’m done with it. I’m finished pretending that I can be satisfied by just anyone, and I am beyond needing a man to hold my hand and tell me I’m beautiful.
Instead, give me a man who I irritate at times, someone who finds himself spinning in circles because I have gotten under his skin and made him believe in this hopeful love.
A man who understands that it’s not my eyes or hair that needs complimenting, but the fiery essence of my soul, because that is what he finds most intoxicating.
A man who has no interest in the cover of my book because he is feverishly reading between the lines of a story—romantically and chaotically interwoven with his.
I simply want it all and I refuse to settle for less.
This may mean that I will continue to tuck myself in, alone each evening with a blanket of stardust as my only companion. But, the truth is, I’d rather wait for a man who expertly tunes me with the soft melodic rhythm of his fingers, instead of spending time with boys who have no idea what to do with a woman like me.
I don’t crave the superficial because I am too busy swimming in the depths, and until a man comes along who craves my depth then I am content playing amongst my budding dreams.
The more I become myself, the more likely I am to attract this amazing love.
Sometimes it’s not that we want too much, but simply that we accept far less than we deserve.
My heart has discovered exactly what it truly means to be a woman—I will never again be satisfied by just good enough.
Because this time, the only love I will accept is the one I deserve.
And that’s why I’m holding out for something far better than just good enough.
Author: Kate Rose
Image : flickr/Michelle B.
Editors: Ashleigh Hitchcock; Emily Bartran