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June 2, 2017

How to Become Everything you Admire in Someone Else.

A post shared by annabelle (@annabelleblythe) on

Our world is rich with inspiration.

We are living in a time when we can stay up to date with some of the greatest artists, thinkers, and leaders of our time through a buzzing box that fits in our pockets.

We hit follow, and become followers of extraordinary human beings. It’s easier than ever to seek out inspiration without every having to leave your town or city.

We follow others to get inspired, and sometimes to learn more about their lives. We crave connection as humans, so it’s no surprise that we love seeing people air out their laundry—clean or dirty—for the world to see.

Sometimes, we see things in these people and our brains go, Hey! I want that!”

What we don’t realize is that our brains are scrambling a direct message from our bodies and our hearts that says, “Hey, I have that”.

We can only see in others what we already have inside ourselves.

Recognizing fearlessness in another is recognizing our inherent fearlessness that we may have forgotten.

We see joy outside because we are joy inside.

This works both ways: When we get angry at something in someone else, it’s anger for that piece inside of us, or a lack of compassion for ourselves when we were like that person in the past.

It’s a big world out there, and it’s easy to seek refuge in other people. Yet, when we confuse the message, we get confused ourselves. It happens time and time again—we see a human we admire, and we project all these qualities onto them. We say, “I want that,” and we deduce that to have that thing—be it joy, fearlessness, hustle, or anything in between—we have to become that person. We start to speak like them, create like them, dress like them, and do all the things that they do.

Sounds crazy?

It is.

Yet, I have done it.

I see friends continue to do it.

I see it all around me.

We throw our desires at these other human beings who are just that: human beings, trying their best.

We want that thing they have so we try to be and “do” that person—when really, we just have to be and do ourselves.

We have to see these qualities we admire in others and hear those same qualities arm-waving, screaming, and jumping up and down inside our hearts saying, “Hey! Look at me! I’m here!” It’s not about the other person—it’s about you.

We become everything we admire in our mentors, leaders, and inspirations when we become more like ourselves.

We have to sit with ourselves and tap into the joy, the freedom, the fearlessness that lives inside of us. We have to recognize that we have free choice—we can choose to live, and be, differently. We can choose to do this work out of or in line with ourselves. But, I promise you, the road will be filled with stop signs and invisible walls until you get off the road to someone else and get back to the path of your own truth, your own authenticity, your own beauty.

There is an incredible sweetness, and bravery, to getting out of your own way and tuning in to yourself. Use the guidance of friends, life coaches, mentors, and inspiring people to guide you back to you, all while knowing it’s been nothing but you all along.

~

Author: Annabelle Blythe
Image: Author’s Own
Editor: Khara-Jade Warren

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