September 4, 2018

I f*#%$&!?%d up today.

I fucked up today.

I don’t know how I could have done better. I tried. But, clearly, it wasn’t good enough. Ah. Let go. Not of the loss—that sucks—but of wishing it were otherwise.

We all make mistakes. We all get sad. We all get defensive.

The key is to take the blame. Sit on that blame.

Otherwise, blame is a hot potato that everyone wants to push away, and as we push it away it just gets bigger.

So be willing to be the first to take that blame. But do not do so out of self-hatred. That is not responsibility. Do so out of friendliness toward oneself and others. We must learn from our mistakes.

We must come back to the present moment, again and again. This is meditation. And, this is life. And, this is what Chogyam Trungpa called the most profound mantra of them all: “Om Grow Up Svaha.”

You can do it. So can I. Imperfection is beautiful.

Perfection is a mirage—its empty water will not quench your thirst.

PS: why use the word “blame”? That’s actually the point—to lean into the sticky pointy messy “blame” stuff, and realize it’s not solid.


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