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I am so grateful for my body.
At the end of my practice this morning, I put my hands on top of my heart and almost burst into tears with gratitude.
This body has been through so much. It’s held a lot of trauma. Loss. Fear. Pain.
I poisoned it with a pack of cigarettes a day for seven years straight. In my teens, I was black-out drunk more times than I can count. I used to pride myself on the fact that I could outdrink anyone, anytime. There were months, years, when I drank every day.
I spent the first 18 years of my life completely clueless about health, filling my body not only with alcohol, but with meat, fried foods, and pretty much anything served on a plate in front of me. The amount of refined sugar and processed foods I’ve had in my life is beyond. I used to love McDonald’s cheeseburgers and bright, neon-colored candy from the bulk aisle.
When I was stressed, I ate. When I was sad, I drank.
Then one day, I made my way to a meditation center—and my whole life changed. They didn’t serve any sugar or coffee or processed foods, and I didn’t understand why.
“Aren’t we here to meditate? To heal?” I asked. “How does food have anything to do with that?”
“What you put in your body is both the symptom and the cause of a lot of our pain,” they told me. “We don’t numb ourselves with anything here. We feel our feelings instead.”
I remember thinking it was all bullsh*t—that our minds were a separate thing from our bodies—but when it was over, I didn’t stop at the McDonald’s at the train station on my way home. I started drinking less. Quit smoking. Ate more vegetables. And two years later, when I met someone who was vegan for the first time in my life, it all made sense.
Everything vibrates at different frequencies. When I eat high-vibrational foods—plants and whole grains—the food on my plate becomes more than just fuel. It becomes a part of my healing. If I consume low-vibrational, processed foods, animals, or foods associated with fear, violence, pain, and death—they become part of the pain I’m trying to heal from.
Eat to heal. Heal to eat. Make kind choices whenever possible (it’s always possible).
And love your body. It’s been through so much.