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Most people know someone who has had a vasectomy.
Most people have heard the horror stories. I will not go into detail about those because those are not the stories that I want to spread.
My experience was the opposite—I had no adverse effects. Of course, I did follow my doctor’s advice and stayed in bed for a couple days. Actually, I stretched it to three. That’s right, I spent three glorious days in bed with my feet up on pillows, drinking beer, and watching sports. My girlfriend was amazing; not only did she bring me breakfast in bed, but lunch and dinner too.
It was hard to lay there and let someone wait on me, hand and foot, but she insisted. She wanted me better, and she was ecstatic that I had undergone a minor outpatient surgery for what would be a major surgery for her with a four-week healing time. On top of that, her surgery included anesthesia. My girlfriend fears very little, but being knocked out for a surgery is one of them.
It’s not that she was not willing to undergo the surgery—she actually went to a consultation for the surgery, but got the run around. The hospital where we live is a Catholic hospital and, as she is still of childbearing age, they were unwilling to do the surgery. She had two more consultation appointments that lead nowhere.
One night, while we were getting ready to go on a date, she told me about her frustrations, and I told her that I would get a vasectomy instead. She was excited and supportive. Ernest Hemingway said: “Always do sober what you said you would do drunk. This, will teach you to keep your mouth shut.” This saying rattled around in my brain for weeks, but then the day came, and the Valium kicked in, and I was actually doing what I said I would do.
The consultation was quick: a few questions, a quick examination, and finally the scheduling of the surgery. The list of adverse effects was a bit intimidating, but I scheduled the appointment anyway. With the ease of setting up the procedure, all I could think was, “We can definitely tell who is doing the legislating,” and to be honest, it is an outrage.
After hearing the frustrations of my girlfriend who was simply trying to make a responsible choice—a woman who has already decided that she does not want children—I don’t understand how can you tell a woman that she now does not have the right to choose whether she gets pregnant or not.
I am sorry, but condoms break, not all women handle birth control well, IUDs are not permanent—and the procedure is painful. Not to go off on a tangent, but it is truly infuriating. Needless to say, I did learn something throughout this process, and I have a deeper understanding of why the women of our nation are so upset. No one has the right to regulate anyone else’s body, and if you happen to feel differently, you may be on the wrong side of history.
I was nervous leading up to the surgery. I don’t think I had a single thought that was not about the surgery the day it was scheduled. I was scared, and to be honest, if it was not for the Valium, I don’t know if I would have climbed onto that table. It was only during the surgery that I realized how painless it actually was.
As I mentioned earlier, I do not have a horror story to tell. By simply following my doctor’s instructions, I had no adverse effects. It has been a couple months since I underwent my surgery, and when I look back, I can say that it is one of the best decisions I have ever made.
I have been through a couple abortions, and I am not proud of that fact. But I feel fortunate that those women had the right to choose. I, for one, will fight for the right for all women to choose, but I also rest easier at night knowing that I will never again be the reason that a woman has to make that choice.
If you are a man reading this—if you have thought about getting a vasectomy—I would strongly recommend it.
Your partner will thank you.