I hope you benefit from my pain

 
Dear Lovely,
He’s great, isn’t he? I’m certain you are floating on cloud nine as I did…in the beginning. I looked forward to each day with anticipation so I could further experience all of his wonderful attributes. Handsome, smart and polite to name a few. However, his most captivating asset by far was his wicked sense of humor. I cannot recall another time in my life which was so full of laughter. It is kryptonite. This humor fueled our connection for months.

Unfortunately for me, our relationship also came with a s*%t ton of painful lessons. Laughter faded into loneliness which in turn caused me to slip into deep depression. By the time we separated, I was emotionally starved. A skeleton of the woman I once saw in the mirror.

If you ever find yourself curled up on the sofa at 3 a.m. wondering what you did wrong please know it’s not you. There is a brokenness deep within him, and it is still healing.

You are loving the best version of him. You are loving the man for whom I yearned deep in my soul. The man I haven’t seen in quite some time. The months of conflict between us eventually gave way to resentment. A resentment that slowly killed our marriage. Only in my absence was he able to find himself again.

I hope my pain was not in vain.

I hope the lessons and pain I endured became your blessings. I still wear the scars from the war we waged against one another. The battles we tirelessly fought eventually became the catalyst for his change. And in the end my wounds became your victory.
 
 

~ The Ex