What Is An Energy Vampire?
Have you ever felt completely drained after an interaction with a specific person? Is there someone in your life that you dread picking up the phone for because you know they are just going to complain? Have you ever heard of an energy vampire? An energy vampire is someone who drains your energy both intentionally and unintentionally.
We all know at least one energy vampire! Here are a few traits to easily recognize one!
- This person likely will not respect yours or have personal boundaries.
- They are always complaining or venting about something.
- An energy vampire feels strongly that nothing in their life ever goes right.
- When you’re around them, suddenly, you feel tired or drained.
- They are usually in a negative mindset.
- This person may speak poorly of themselves or others more often than not.
- Energy vampires are often sad, ill, or tired themselves due to a low vibration.
- People might refer to them as a “Negative Nancy.”
- Energy vampires have a thick aura about them and make people feel unsettled when they are around.
- Energy vampires can shift the energy of the room by merely walking in it (and not in a good way).
- An energy vampire will use your energy to help make themselves feel better while offering nothing in return. A great example of this is a friend who is continually coming to you and venting while never asking how you’re doing or feeling, and if they do, they don’t listen when you’re talking.
Now listen, like it or not, we have all been this person at one point or another. We all go through a range of emotions and have our good days and our bad days. An energy vampire is different than having the occasional bad day or a day where you need to vent. Energy vampires are often unaware that they are draining other people’s energy, and to be honest, they usually don’t mean to!
When you start to raise your vibration, you become cognizant of your energy, which is a good thing! You start to realize when you’re sending out negative vibes. This gives you a chance to shift or excuse yourself until you’re feeling better. Doing self-expansive work helps you to realign with what serves you and recognize what is not.
As empaths and intuitives, we often attract the wounded and the lost. Why? Because we have a light that other souls can feel, and they are naturally pulled to it for healing. Other souls know about our light long before we do, which is why many intuitives have rough lives or traumatizing experiences before they align with their path. Once aligned and know how to manage their energy, they often find that wounded souls start to disperse, and lighter ones fill the space.
I believe there are two main types of energy vampires here on Earth.
The Woe Is Me, energy vampire
Have you ever encountered someone that loved to complain but never did anything to change their situation? This person often loves to play the victim and to have people feel sorry for them. They will complain to anyone who will listen. This type of energy vampire shares the same stories over and over because, on a deep level, they just want to be heard.
The issue here is the person on the other end of the conversation or you. When you first come in contact with this type of person, you’re likely to listen intently and offer heart-centered advice. You will often feel sad for them and offer to help or provide healing wisdom. After a while, though, you realize that every time you talk to them, you feel exhausted or frustrated after. You spend so much energy trying to help or worrying about their issues that you’re left depleted after the interaction while they feel better.
This type of energy vampire wants your love, your attention, and compassion. There isn’t an equal energy exchange in these types of relationships, which is why we get drained. We offer so much to them; advice, love, compassion, but when they do nothing to change their situation, and we keep giving, we are left frustrated and drained. Thus the energy vampire.
The toxic energy vampire
Hurt people, hurt people. I’m sure we have all heard this quote, and when it comes to these energy vampires, you want to remember they are doing the best with what they have, but that doesn’t mean you have to be a part of it.
The toxic energy vampire is the abusive type, whether mentally, emotionally, physically, verbally, or energetically.
They often try to make people feel small to make themselves feel better. Inside they are hurting, and on the outside, they are deflecting. Remember this when coming in contact with this type, it has nothing to do with you. Also, remember to set your personal and energetic boundaries because you do not have to succumb to it!
Toxic energy vampires can make you feel like you’re on eggshells when around them. They speak poorly of others, hurt others, and defend every cynical move they make. These types drain energy emotionally and can profoundly affect you if you’re not managing your energy correctly.
Of course, these aren’t the only two types, and the types can mix. They can vary extremes, but I think you get the picture.
I do want to note that just because someone is an energy vampire doesn’t mean you abandon them or cast them out. We teach others how to treat us by how we treat ourselves, so it is imperative to set energetic boundaries. It’s your job to protect yourself as an empath and vibrate so high that you know when to hang up the phone or walk away.
I have a few of these in my life who I choose to love from a safe distance. When the phone rings, I choose if I have the energy capacity to handle it and if so, I allow myself no more than 20 minutes once the complaining starts. When they are physically near me, I create space, put up my boundaries, and call in both of our guides to help with the interactions. When I am around a toxic vampire, I use the soul to soul technique to help generate a more positive communication, and I keep the visit as short and as loving as possible.
The more you heal and discover yourself, the less of these vampires will show up naturally! Let’s work together to see how you can vibrate higher, shift into a more loving consciousness, and live a life you adore!
Ashley Strong is an intuitive development coach, mindset mentor, and psychic medium. She has been blogging about all things spirit, positivity, and self-evolution for the past 4 years on her site LightLoveandSpirit.com. Ashley is a nature wandering, beach-loving, mom of two, and a wife of her high school sweetheart. She works to bring a down to earth approach to all things woo-woo in order to help everyone live a heart-centered and intuitively guided life they love!