Sitting on my back deck enjoying the warming rays of the noon sun, I began reflecting on the past few days of my quarantine.
Very few phone calls were made or returned by me, and one or two emails have been sent. Limited visits to social media, and social distancing in every way possible embraced.
The house is stocked with everything needed to survive for about a year. The car is filled with gasoline. If a grocery run is required, I will be set. My husband is working close to his job but far away from home.
I am totally alone. All alone…
And I love it.
I cannot remember the last time happiness filled my soul as much as it has in these days of being by myself.
You see, I am an extra extreme extrovert. I am the life of the party. I bring the fun. My life’s motto has always been “I am not coming to the revolution if I can’t dance.” But now, spending these last few weeks alone, my new motto is “If there are people at the revolution, don’t invite me; I’m not coming.”
All alone and I love it.
I love my alone time. Is this what introverts have been experiencing?
I have fallen in love with me all over again. I have embraced the beauty of me. Being left alone with all my wonderful thoughts—ohhh, baby. I had forgotten just how brilliant I am.
The most wonderful place in the world is inside my mind. Pondering the world, overthinking past interactions, creating new nonessential conversations that will never happen except in my imagination. Laughing at my own silliness, singing songs I made up, learning to play an instrument by placing paper over my comb. The fun, the joy, the freedom.
I love that space inside my head.
And I am reading. And I am writing. I love reading. I love writing. I remember how much I love to write. I love passionately pouring out my thoughts on paper. I have written my first article—three more to come. I have read the books lying on the bookshelf. I am going through my 2020 book list quickly
Really loving it.
And then my home—oh, my home. My home is bringing me such contentment. So many working days I left my home before the sun rose and returned when the sun began to set; I had no idea how sunny it is inside my home.
My home is so naturally brightly lit by the sun that I have no need for manmade light. My plants are flourishing from bathing in the sun as my curtains are open all day long now. And to think my house was about to be on the market in a few short months; I now realize what a gem I own.
The serene quietness of being still has refreshed me like a cool, sweet drink on a hot summer day.
I love my place.
And my senses—they have been awakened.
My showers are no longer a 10-minute rush as I get ready for my work commute. I now spend 45 minutes to an hour basking in the heavenly flood of H2O. Has the water always felt so soothing? I stand and enjoy the flow as it saturates my hair, splashes over my shoulders, and cascades down my toes to the shower’s drain.
And my taste buds. Did wine always taste as good as it does when a glass is sipped in thirty minutes instead of two? Also, RumChata so sweet and warm; I love the milky whiteness of this delicious beverage.
My senses are alive.
I have discovered me. The dark surreal beauty of me. From the soft, smooth feel of my flawless skin to the sweet, savory smell of my entire being.
I am enjoying me. I am enjoying you. I am enjoying everything.