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November 1, 2020

What protesting taught me about the power in personal responsibility.

     Ironically enough, my commitment to the practice of Buddhism, and reconnection to Spirituality began with an act of violence in the form of me breaking an emotionally abusive person’s nose after they grabbed me so hard that they left bruises on my arms.
My Human Experience up this point has been filled with trauma, triumph and adversity; as well as so many other things in between. One day I will go into detail about those experiences, but I apologize for mentioning it, because today is not that day. I want to express that I have experienced so many instances of joy; an abundance of exquisite moments that even now live so strongly in my memory as to sustain me when sorrow ebbs in. I merely share this because I want to communicate that I have suffered.
Now days I try to refrain from making absolute statements (if you knew me even three years ago, you would probably not believe me capable of such a feat, lol), but it stands to reason that every single one of you reading this could easily identify something that has caused you to suffer. Anything from paying your bills, to a physical ailment.  No matter your beliefs, or politics about 95 seconds into any outlet of news could probably do it. That is to say in this, we are the same. Regardless of the individual reasonings behind it, we have been hurt, and thus suffered.
I’ve come to observe that we aren’t necessarily big on understanding an opposition these days. We tend to be very quick to try and disconnect as soon as a difference that we can’t justify is perceived, and yet, so many would claim to be “tolerant”. I myself have been guilty of this in the past, as eventually I could find a reason to shut someone down if their view was arrogant, or disrespectful, or a million and one other reasons I chose to get affronted. And IT.WAS.MY.CHOICE. I just didn’t understand that yet.
You see, I absolutely had the power to handle the situation how I chose to, I always had. However, because I was not as self aware as I could have been, I couldn’t healthily communicate boundaries, and thus tended to often times behave quite reactionarily. Reactionary isn’t neccesarily a negative thing, but when you consider that our neurological systems are hardwired for a flight or fight response that isn’t continuously necessary these days, it is highly unlikely that this is the most productive, or healthy response.
If you’re still reading this, I appreciate you so very much, and I hope it will now come full circle with The Buddhism, and even the Plea for Peace in the title.
I attended a protest today to try and remind people that we are all one. You could call it Anti-War, but that’s only in the sense that I am Pro-Peace, as I save the “antis” for hate-based avenues. This was a HUGE personal victory in so many ways, but one of the most profound being the opportunity to really test my “spiritual” developement.
I once would often times be unkind to unkind people, and while it is often justified in our current society, that is not who I CHOOSE to be. To quote the Tao of Batman, “If you murder a Murderer, the number of Murderers doesn’t go down.” There was a man that continued to drive by, and flip us off, and scream hatred and vitriol. At one time, I probably would have gotten aggressive and hostile, as was my right, and also just as much my choice; because I felt it an acceptable defense. However today, after the third or fourth time I yelled, “I love you anyways!”
They say Rome wasn’t built in a day, and similarly this man drove by yet again. This time though, he merely drove, and I’d like to believe that shows a bit of progress, as there was less violence in any noticeable form in the World from him at that moment. So couldn’t it be argued that my non-violent plea for peace worked? It MIGHT, but because I don’t want my experience to end on an irony as well, I’ll merely extend my gratitude for you taking the time to share in my journey, and send you love.
Until I write again,
Yo

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