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December 11, 2020

What can I do to overcome this feeling of jealousy in my heart?

Jealousy is one of the most toxic emotions that a human being can feel. Even though we are gravely aware about the dangers of this emotion, most, if not all of us, have at some point experienced it.

What is it that makes jealousy an emotion that one should overcome? And how does one overcome it?

Let us find out!

We take a simple example. Suppose our neighbours have bought a new car. So, we congratulate them and say all the nice things we are expected to say. But wait! What’s this that’s going on deep down in our heart? “How happy are they?… It’s ok. Everyone these days buys a new car; big deal?!… When will it be our turn to experience this joy?” In just a matter of minutes, we travelled from being participative in our neighbour’s joy, to being passively indifferent towards the whole thing, and finally moved on to being actively jealous and seething with frustration.

Do you know, a single thought of jealousy can ruin our day, our relationships, and even our health?

Why then do we allow such toxicity into our system? What use is it?

It’s of no use whatsoever. And just a bit of rational thinking on our part would make it amply clear to us that while our neighbours have had a good day today, it is not that they enjoy only good days and we only have bad ones in store. We too have had our share of happiness at every step in life so far, haven’t we? And who knows, circumstances tomorrow might get us what we feel is making our neighbours happy today.

Where there is right understanding, there is no space for jealousy.

Therefore, let’s understand the law of karma correctly. The law of karma states that everyone is bearing the fruits of their own karma, good or bad. If we have good intentions, we bind good or punya karma, the fruit of which shall be good; but if we have ill intentions, we automatically bind bad or paap karma, the fruits of which shall make us suffer in life. Thus, any happiness that comes our way is a result of our own previous good karmas, and any pain and misery that we experience today is because of some bad karma we happened to charge previously. We are the ones who have designed our fate.

As explained by Param Pujya Dada Bhagwan, our karmic accounts carried forward from our previous lives determine the events that happen in our present life. Nature just brings together all the circumstances so that the event happens accordingly.

So where comes the question of jealousy then? Our fate is according to our design, and the neighbour’s fate is according to their design. The circumstances that we meet in life are in accordance with our previous life’s karma, and the circumstances that our neighbours meet in their life are in accordance with their previous life’s karma. Through this right understanding, the feeling of jealousy in our heart can be easily overcome.

Whenever jealousy crops up: “I too want to have what you have,” we shall remind ourselves of the law of karma as explained above, and encourage ourselves for good, “If I have good intentions, I shall bind good karma, the fruit of which shall be good in future. But if I have jealousy, then I shall bind new bad karma, which means even in future, I will not get what I want to have. So let me first overcome the jealousy in my heart and make way for good intentions instead to stay in my heart.”

Thereafter, every morning, we should not forget to make a heart-felt prayer to God, “Dear God, May no living being be ever caused the slightest hurt through any of my thoughts, words or actions.” Repeat this prayer five times every day, and see; you have already begun with making this best intention a part of your life. This prayer shall yield beautiful results and you will soon find that not only jealousy, but a lot many other toxic emotions too such as anger, false pride, deceit, greed, ego, competition, etc. have started to take an exit from our heart.

And if we want speedier results, every night, for at least ten minutes, meditate upon what all happened through the day and find out whether anyone was hurt by us in any way. For every such instance that you locate, pray to God and seek his forgiveness for the same, “Dear God, I made so and so mistake today. Eg. I got jealous of my neighbour’s success today. Please forgive me and grant me strength so that I do not do this mistake again.” It may happen that the same mistakes continue to repeat; but you on your part continue to pray to God asking for forgiveness every day. With this, our mistakes begin to get washed off and soon we overcome our weakness too. When our efforts are earnest, we get to see magical results

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