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February 23, 2021

How I Coped When My Ex Remarried

Photo by Francesca Zama on Pexels.

My ex-husband has remarried.

You know how it goes. A friend sees something on Facebook whilst mindlessly scrolling. Am I still too delicate to handle it? Was it appropriate to tell me?

In the end, the truth was told, as gently as possible. And I am truly grateful that she did decide to tell me.

I’m not shocked. I already knew that he was engaged. I had a strange reaction; a painful cut to my heart, but only a knick. That night, I had dreams filled with rejection. The main star was my first real boyfriend, which is weird, but hey, whatever.

I discussed it with a couple of friends. I concluded that although it does indeed hurt a bit, I’m still relieved that we’re not together anymore.

I’m not a nice enough person to wish them the best.

A Taylor Swift song that my friend sent me includes a few lyrics that perfectly fit my emotions.

15 years, 15 million tears
Begging ’til my knees bled
I gave it my all, he gave me nothing at all
Then wondered why I left

Now he sits on his throne in his palace of bones
Praying to his greed
He’s got my past frozen behind glass
But I’ve got me

That old familiar body ache
The snaps from the same little breaks in my soul
I know when it’s time to go

Sometimes giving up is the strong thing
Sometimes to run is the brave thing
Sometimes walking out is the one thing
That will find you the right thing

Thank you, young, yet wise Taylor Swift.

I wouldn’t go back, hell no. I’ve gained too much. It’s been such a long journey returning to myself. Going backward is not an option.

Discard, devalue, replace.

I don’t only have myself back but my relationship with my daughter is stronger than ever.

That’s a true love story, if you ask me.

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