There’s a definition of Conscious Sexuality that I use.
It’s to be present during sex, and to be with whatever arises, whatever emerges.
It’s a way in to the more of sex, a doorway to what our sexual energy, and our experiences, can show us.
It’s a way in to healing, to awareness, to growing, to expanding.
It’s a way in to our bodies, our hearts.
It’s a way in to our shadow, to our subconscious.
When we look at those words.
During sex, and we understand that sex is not only penetration, it’s not only genitals, it’s not only orgasm.
And sex is not always with someone else.
And then it’s to be with whatever arises, whatever emerges.
Maybe some insecurity, some fear of rejection. Maybe something about our bodies not functioning properly.
Maybe some of the patterning and conditioning we have about ourselves, our bodies, our pleasure.
Maybe some of our inhibitions, our fears.
And, in time, if we’re willing, we go to the deeper places within us, deeper and deeper.
This is where it gets interesting.
This is where we see that there is so much more to sex than some pleasure, for most of us quite short, for most of us focused on orgasm, on release, on getting off.
We see how our sexual experiences, in the range of possibility, become a way in to ourselves.
And, in time, a way to freedom.
Freedom from patterning and conditioning that keeps us doing the same things in the same way.
Freedom from the beliefs we have about ourselves, our bodies, life, love.
Freedom from the illusions we have about who we are, who we’ve become in order to make ourselves acceptable to others.
We drop through layers of awakening, of awareness.
We start slowly, we dip a toe into the water.
And over time we step deeper into the water of mystery, to meet that which arises. It’s within us, waiting for us. It’s always been there.
And there are other freedoms.
The freedom to see what’s really within us, what we really desire, what really turns us on, interests us, draws us, excites us.
To see who we are.
And sometimes it’s not ‘nice’, it’s not polite.
But it’s powerful, creative, alive, vibrant, juicy.
And we can use this, in many ways in our lives.
The freedom of curiosity, of exploration and discovery.
The freedom to drop the story, when we drop the pattern.
The freedom to be more of ourselves, not within the confines of anyone else’s judgment.
The freedom to claim more of our pleasure, not only sexually, but in all of life.
For all of these, we come back to our definition, to be present, to be aware.
And to feel what we’re feeling, not rush over it, not get distracted by pleasure, by the rush, the chase to orgasm.
To feel, to be aware of what’s happening inside of us, what’s coming to the surface.
And to give it space, give it time.
To be with ourselves.
This is part of the beauty, the mystery, the power of our sexuality.
What’s within it, what’s within us.
It can be in a kiss, it can be in a look, it can be in a kink session, it can be in a sexua spiritual experience, it can be in a conversation.
It can arise anytime.
And the freedom is in acknowledging it, whatever it is, and exploring it.
This is the world of possibility.
Anything, in any moment.
In our bodies, in our hearts, in our minds.
In our sexuality, limitless.
And the greater the range of experience we’ll allow, the more will be revealed.