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October 14, 2022

1000 deaths in one body.

Sometimes it feels like I’ve died and been reborn a thousand times in this one body.

My heart echoes with the songs of too many lifetimes to counts.

My bones have disintegrated and I have laid in the ashes of my own remains

Howling for reprieve

Only to be put back together again and again

I  swore I wouldn’t/couldn’t go on

I cursed the Gods of the Cosmos and the Earth

I begged

“I just want to go home”

And I quit.

And my thoughts dissolved

Acid ripped through each breath

Cement Hardening in my throat

And I laid down my weapons.

And as my skin boiled from the internal fire

I sank into the earth

And my rib cages became hollow

Tho the thunderous ache still clamored with each breath

And I let go

A steady rot

My cosmic stardust melting into the soil

My mind no longer in control

My heart full exposed

And I rest

In the purified experience

Like the air after a long rain

I was clean, hydrated

Nurturing each new seed

Continuously rooting into all parts of me.

And I grew.

To be continued….

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