New year, new me, but what about new year, better us?
Infuse some extra juice into your relationship this year by setting couple goals. Couple goals nurture and strengthen your romantic relationship by reinforcing that it is a central priority.
Setting couple goals is extra important because it allows you to align your intentions together ensuring that you and your partner are working toward the same things. You and your partner backing each other’s intention to create change helps to bolster chances of success.
There are three steps to creating successful couple goals.
Step 1: What did we do well this year?
Start by reflecting on what you did well this year both individually and as a couple. Try to keep the conversation focused on the positive. This will help keep momentum on setting goals instead of getting drawn back into old conflicts or feelings of lack. You are here to be each other’s ally in having more good things in your relationship. Even if this was a growth year, there are still many things that you did well together. A helpful way to kick off this conversation is to share a favorite memory of each other from the last year.
Step 2: What do we want more of?
For this second step, grab a piece of paper and write down what you want more of in the next year. This strengths-based approach to goal setting starts from the perspective that you and your relationship are already “enough.” The goals being set are here to enhance and revitalize your relationship, not fix something that is broken.
Below are some examples to help get you started.
This year I want more…
>> time together
>> active dates
Step 3: Set Holistic Goals
The final step in this process is writing down specific and attainable goals that satisfy the desires of your multifaceted roles. It is easy to over focus on one area of the relationship that is either really in need, or where there is a natural strength. Developing goals for each of the below areas ensures that all areas get addressed and that the fun of couplehood doesn’t get lost in the responsibilities of it.
Create a goal for each of the following categories:
- Practical Partnership Goal
- Fun Goal
- Spicy Goal
- Secret Goal
- Personal Development Goal
- Family goal
January comes every year and with it comes renewed hopes, dreams, and expectations. This year, start your year off differently by sitting down with your partner and diving into the fun and enlightening process of creating couple goals.
These goals serve as a road map as you navigate and make decisions over the next year. They are tools you can use at any point during the year in order to come into alignment with each other. Write them down and keep them handy, and revise them as needed.
Your relationship is worth the extra time and attention that it takes to complete this exercise.