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July 28, 2023

How to Make a Little Room for Sadness.

“We must understand that sadness is an ocean, and sometimes we drown, while other days we are forced to swim.” ~ R.M. Drake

 

Sometimes it hits you like a tidal wave and you can’t help yourself from being engulfed by it.

All you can do is watch yourself as the waves wrap you up and take you away to all those spaces in your mind that you just don’t want to go to but have no choice in the moment.

You’re hit by the rocks of your past, boulders of your present, and you watch your future slip from underneath your feet as you flow.

You struggle to grasp and catch hold of whatever you can find, but there’s nothing to hold onto.

So you flow and that, too, comes with such force that you simply can’t even comprehend.

And it continues till the waves get tired of carrying you around.

Then things begin to slow down and you finally manage to find a rock or boulder that you can hold onto, finally making sense of what just happened.

But at times you can’t make sense of it.

This sadness that shows up out of nowhere and refuses to go is annoying, frustrating, and painful.

This sadness that is made up of more sadness, some anger, frustration, regret, and loss.

Perhaps there’s some grief thrown in there too.

“Every human walks around with a certain kind of sadness. They may not wear it on their sleeves, but it’s there if you look deep.” ~ Taraji P. Henson

It’s supposed to be stuffed in some remote corner of your mind and heart. It’s supposed to be forgotten.

But it’s smart. It knows when to show up. It knows its power and that you can’t stop it from coming up.

It also knows that you’re going to fight it with everything you’ve got. So it comes prepared to engulf you and take you with it.

 “The word ‘happy’ would lose its meaning if it were not balanced by sadness.” ~ Carl Jung

And it does that until you stop fighting it.

Until you acknowledge its presence and make some room for it.

Until you allow it to show up and sit beside you so that it can share with you all that it needs to.

Your sadness carries all the pain that you try so hard not to feel.

It shows up once in a while or maybe every now and then to remind you of all that you couldn’t have and all that would never be.

Sometimes it’s disguised as all your love that went unseen.

At other times it’s about the love that you have never received.

“It is sad not to love, but it is much sadder not to be able to love.” ~ Miguel de Unamuno

All it wants is to sit beside you and just talk—let it out.

“Every life has a measure of sorrow, and sometimes this is what awakens us.” ~ Steven Tyler

It wants you to let it all out and unload a little because when you don’t, you fill up even more.

This sadness of yours is not your enemy; it’s your friend. It’s just another part of you that wants you to acknowledge its presence.

That’s all that it wants.

So the next time you’re hit by this wave, don’t run or hide. Just be there and allow it to wash over you.

Just give it some time and space. It will come and go in its own time.

You just need to be.

“Heavy hearts, like heavy clouds in the sky, are best relieved by the letting of a little water.” ~ Christopher Morley

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