For the weary soul of women everywhere, it seemed like a dream that we were told the key to love is embracing the knowledge of the masculine and feminine.

That maybe this movement would lead to us no longer carrying society upon our backs or being the one to make all the plans, and yet it only turned out to be another lie carefully spun for us by the still dying patriarchy.

Because in this myth of masculine and feminine energy, we are told that feminine is soft, and that masculine is strong when in every species on Earth it isn’t the male that defends, but the female.

We have been sold a watered-down Disney princess version of what femininity is, and then it’s been capitalized upon by those who desire to keep women locked in the trap of not being enough and too much simultaneously.

The truth is that each person, plant, flower, tree, and planet in the cosmos has both masculine and feminine energy.

Masculine doesn’t mean male, nor feminine woman, but speaks to the universal law of balance that each living thing on this planet and in the stars possesses.

And yet, it was to women that this idea of femininity was sold, while to men it was a toxic inaccurate display of masculinity. This has not only created more imbalance, but it also distorted the true meaning of these energies so much that we’ve now twisted ourselves into roles that were never meant to fit.

A woman doesn’t need to be more feminine just as a man doesn’t need to be more masculine, but each person does need to find a healthier balance within themselves.

A woman with a significant drive of masculine energy is someone who gets something done in her life. She’s passionate and often highly sexual and because of the innate path of balance, she’s also the one who usually looks more feminine. She has built herself up to be her own protector and she takes charge of life, knowing it’s up to her to build what she wants to enjoy.

Yet, a man with more feminine energy often feels insecurity because he doesn’t measure up to what society says a man should be. He feels more, craves consistency and more downtime.

Neither is wrong for who they are though; they just need to create more balance within themselves.

The woman in her masculine needs to make sure she can rest, receive, and feel enough, while the man in his feminine needs to learn to take a stand and believe in his ability to go after what he wants.

Then, of course, there are those who have rightly defied these strict norms that we’ve been told to all adopt. They are nonbinary or just simply refuse to be labeled in any way. And yet, these people are humans, and so they too have these energies within themselves.

It’s no one’s job to tell you to be less masculine so you can attract a romantic partner, just as you’re not going to find masculinity by putting down others to make yourself feel better.

But seldom is what is sold to the masses about what is right or good for all of us, because while the idea of masculine and feminine seems to be spiritual in nature, it also speaks to the patriarchal lie that one sex is the weaker one.

The strongest people I’ve ever met are those who gave birth, who fought for their rights, who show up day after day for those they care about and the injustices of the world.

It just so happens those people are women.

Women were born strong, and while we may no longer have a physical memory of a matriarchal society, it’s one that still lives in our bones. After all, it’s through the womb that history is written and societies are established. And we don’t change the world by becoming less masculine, or really, less of who we’ve always been.

Because any love worth having isn’t going to require that you become less.

Any healthy romantic partner won’t point to your femininity or masculinity as a reason why it’s not working.

Now that doesn’t mean that we aren’t in a collective identity crisis as women are rising and men are struggling to figure out where they now fit, but diminishing the growth of anyone isn’t going to help anyone keep evolving.

Internal balance is.

Letting go of the lie that you are too masculine for love, or not enough of a man, is to grow beyond the lies that we were all told.

The idea isn’t for the feminine to stay at home baking a la trad wife style, but to be able to be her own protector, to be soft when she needs to and fight when life requires it. Just as masculinity is more than war crimes, aggression, and sexuality. It too is a protector, a supporter, and tenderness.

This is a lie that isn’t only no longer productive, but it’s one that we’ve outgrown, because we are more than solely one energy, or one persona.

We are humans, and it’s that which always makes us worthy of love.

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