Asserting your intuition.

After spending many years as a mother of four kids (now fully grown),  I lost my identity in who I really was.  I threw my heart and soul into my husband and my family, and I didn’t exist spiritually or emotionally.

I had spent 20 years of my life giving and giving that I faded into the background.   On August 9th 2009, something happened to me.  Not an terrible accident or anything, it was something inside.  I was sitting in a chair looking out of the window in my house when I felt like someone or something said ‘Why are you living like this?  Your husband is abusing you, and you have been living like this for way too long.  This is not your purpose in life!  You must do something NOW!

Shortly after that my husband came home and I had this dazed look on my face, he knew something was wrong.  I asked him, ‘Why did you force yourself on me last night, you know that I take sleeping medication? He denied it and dismissed it like some crumbs left on a table.  I walked into the kitchen and asked him again. ‘Why did you force yourself to have sex with me while I was knocked out?  Now I was becoming angry.  After denying that he did anything I left the house and drove myself to the hospital where I was checked by a forensic nurse.  I thought I was going mad!  After examination (which is humiliating) she confirmed that not only did he force himself on me but I was ripped inside as well.

I looked over and saw all the ‘evidence’ containers and I felt violated and numb.  I wasn’t crazy!

I cried all the way home wondering who is this man? Why? My mind was blown!  I walked into the house and asked him one last time. ‘Why did you force yourself on me last night when I was incoherent?  I was pissed at this point and he knew it!  He stood there and denied it again!  That was it!  I was done!  I called the police and had him arrested!

Boom!  My marriage  (or what I thought was a marriage) was over. Yet I didn’t feel sad I was mad.  This man had treated me like this for year’s and I was done.

I moved out, got divorced and asked for nothing as I wanted no connection with this man. And I started life on my own.  Jump forward to today, I am living life how I want to live and I have finally found ME!

I learned alot from that feeling that day.  That was my intuition screaming at me until I finally listened!  I am still learning my true path but holy cow what a life changing experience!

Yoga saved me. I became a teacher and taught women who were abused and helped build there self esteem.

My intuition is always with me and I listen to it always!

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