I Changed. You didn’t.
How do I change? This is insane
All the work to be done, my unresolved pain.
Where do I go, what do I do?
I thought life was easy, simply not true.
What’s the point, why do I care?
Waist of space, a life to spare.
I’m miserable and lonely, I just want to change
I’d do anything to start over, but souls can’t be exchanged.
This time must be different, if not I’m fucked
My chances are over, all out of luck.
You swept me through hell and dropped me in place
I’m suffocating from failure, give me some space.
Leave me alone, I need to get better
Just escape my life after reading this letter.
Why are you so invested in keeping me sick?
Am I the only one who you choose to pick?
I’m letting you win this battle, admitting defeat
I haven’t given up though, I promise it’s you, I will beat.
You’re not in control, these are my decisions
Please back up, I’m making some revisions.
You’ve done too much damage, it’s been long enough
I broke free from your prison, it’s all just a bluff
Find someone else who is willing to die
That isn’t me, so don’t even try.
I am getting healthy, working through time
Finding my God, who’s help is sublime.
Wishing this didn’t happen, but knowing it did
Not as an adult, but started as a kid.
Holding on so tight, not letting go
The power of denial, reaching my ultimate low
No such thing with addiction, the cycle never ends
Until you’re honest with yourself, looking through a different lense.
I couldn’t see how bad things really got
If I had just listened, lived as I was taught.
But that wasn’t an option, things had to be my way
Look where that got me, all I do is pray.
I created a monster of myself, inside and out
I’m ready to change, take away self-doubt.
This isn’t who I am, I want my life back
I’m all set with drugs, coke heroine and crack.
I have a life purpose, I believe in that now
I rely on my faith, God take a bow.
I don’t want to die anymore, I actually care
Don’t take that from me, don’t you dare.
My life has meaning, I’m confident in that
No more strike outs, I’m ready to bat.
That’s all I can say, just let me do this
I’m no longer your target, you can shoot and miss
I’m over it, your fatal lifestyle
If you want to continue, take It to trial.
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