Mutual Empowerment Beyond Gender Politics.

Many more women than men are survivors of rape
Most perpetrators of rape and violence are male

There is violence. There are a lot of violent men. The rest of us are as much receivers of violence as any woman. Problem is not men, but violence. And more specifically male violence, therefore male suffering that causes violence. Is it not about time we tried understanding male suffering? Not as an excuse for men’s violent behaviour, but to find a better solution to it – a solution that is much more likely to work than merely uttering words like “toxic masculinity,” “mansplaining,” and “manspreading.”

A lot of men are aware of male violence and they are as tired of it as a lot of women. It is time us men speak up. Activism needs to resist the temptation to address men or women as a group. Most men are regular folk trying to live their lives as best as they can. They might not be aware or informed about women’s challenges as much as activists would like them to, but that doesn’t make them sexist or misogynist.

There is a better, more noble path for today’s activism beyond the “check your privilege” rhetoric. There are and have always been ways women have been privileged as well, but how can we move forward if the only thing we’re doing is blame and finger pointing?

We are bound together in so many ways. Isn’t it time we found more common ground and actually worked together to overcome the challenges of our lives?

Most victims of violence are male
A lot more men than women die from suicide
When a man is being attacked, chances are no one will help him

A lot of things are shit for the regular man. Truly privileged men are rare, and there are also truly privileged women. Congress having more men or the fact that there are more male engineers than female doesn’t change this reality. Yet still regular man has work to do. I know this all too well from personal experience.

Men, it is time we woke up to the madness we live in. Men, it is time we continued doing our part in helping civilization move forward – this time by looking within. There is a better life on the other side of workaholism, angry outbursts, depression, substance misuse, porn addiction, or relational immaturity.

The challenges of our times require not bigger muscles, but a softening heart that is as brave as it is vulnerable.

Men, it is time.

Comments