You Don’t Owe Anyone A Damned Thing

Dear Woman,

I’ll put this plainly and hope my words will wake you. I hope you’ll finally understand the freedom of letting go, of release, especially in comparison to the tight shackles keeping you chained to the past. You can’t keep giving time and attention to people who don’t want you or love you.

You deserve so much more than what you settle for.

Someone who cares for you doesn’t leave when life gets tough, they stick around. They try. They put in the time and effort. They show, by their actions, how important you are to them.

Sure, those females, those “friends,” the ones shit talking you behind your back, the ones that talk down to you just as frequently as they judge you, the ones who exclude you then make sure you know you were excluded, those women are just petty, mean girls (no matter their age). They are women so unhappy with their lives they have to make another person feel small. Theyd be better off taking a good whiff of their own shit instead of worrying about yours.

Okay, that guy, the one you’re waiting for, the one whos unsure, the one you think needs time, he’s just another man, like all the others, who can’t (or won’t) open himself to you. He never commits to anything, instead enjoying the perks of being half in and half out of a relationship. Kudos to you for asking him to step up! There’s nothing wrong with wanting action to back up all those sweet, loving words pouring from his lips. There’s nothing weird about needing reassurance, we all do.

Just because he said he can’t or won’t give you what you need doesn’t mean there’s something  wrong with him or with you. It just means his part in your story is over.

Finis. Done. Completed.

So, let them all go.

Let that man and those ladies fly. Push them out if you have to. They can’t keep standing in the door way, half in and half out. They’re blocking the path for other, genuinely caring possible friends and lovers that want to know you.

Its true, you’ve been friends with those other women for years. You’ve shared memories, laughter, fun times, and tears with them, you opened up your life and heart to them, happy to call them friends. However, real friends don’t give you silence, passive aggressive actions, shit talking behind your back, and they certainly don’t go out of their way to make you feel unworthy. A true friend tells you how it is and sticks by you, through good, bad, thick, and thin.

Please, let that “clique” boast, brag, and bitch to each other, without you. The same goes for that emotionally unavailable man you’ve grown so attached to.

Yes, he says he loves you, but he’s doing absolutely nothing about it. He’s letting you, wonderful, warm, intelligent, funny female that you are, walk away without a fight. He’s letting a person he proclaims to care for, cry lonely tears every day and night. If that doesn’t tell you how little your presence matters in his life, nothing else will.

Let him live without you. You owe nothing to someone who can’t give you a tiny bit of fucking effort or truth.

Stop making yourself so available. Stop letting yourself be hurt.

Stop being a victim. Instead, be proud of yourself.

You set a boundary and stuck to it for the first time in your life. You asked for what you needed instead of swallowing your wants and keeping quiet. You walked away instead of silently enduring the pain.

You strengthened your spirit, heart, and mind. 

Now, it’s time to forgive the ignorance of those who don’t understand you and move on.

Its time for you to finally be free.

Sincerely,

A Woman Who Was Once Just Like You

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