You Too Can be a Wal-Mart Hipster! Fixies for the Low Price of $149…

Via on Mar 25, 2010

wal mart hipsters bikes fixies bike bicycle "anna brones"

Admit it. Deep down you just wish you were cool enough to permanently dress in skinny jeans and chain smoke while sipping espresso from pretentious sounding coffee grinders. Well, if you have yet to realize your dreams of hipsterdom, now’s your chance: Walmart’s selling fixed gears, and they’re only $149 a pop.

walmart

You know an what was thought to be an underground fad has gone completely mainstream when its essential accessory is being sold by one of the biggest box stores in the country. Although you might want to consider scratching the Mongoose logo off… any self respecting hipster would never be seen with a branded bike — although the fixie is a sort of branding in and of itself.

But simply buying a fixed gear won’t make you a hipster… you’ll need a mustache as well, which is easily doable with American Apparel’s balaclava:

moustache

Alright, we’re off to buy an accompanying messenger bag from an obscure brand…

About Anna Brones

Anna Brones is a writer, producer and the author of The Culinary Cyclist. She is also the founder and editor of Foodie Underground.

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5 Responses to “You Too Can be a Wal-Mart Hipster! Fixies for the Low Price of $149…”

  1. alli says:

    wait, you can't be a hipster if you bought your bike from Walmart.

  2. AjHK says:

    No you definitely can. Isn't WalMart soooooo funny?

  3. [...] even fit the description… just a little bit. At least you’re not at the point of buying WalMart fixies yet. We’ll take svennebanans over pretend hipsters any [...]

  4. AJ says:

    It’s so perfectly ironic, the foundation of hipsterdom.

  5. [...] this with your favorite fixie riding, coffee snobbish, AA wearing, obscure band listening, wished they lived in Portlandia [...]

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