Kids These Days.

Via on Dec 16, 2010
a gift from me to you.. by Joe Madonna, on Flickr
Creative Commons Attribution 2.0 Generic Licensephoto by  Joe Madonna

The Apprentice’s Gift.

My five year old was disappointed. He sat on the small elf chair at the Christmas worktable,

“Mine’s not good at all. See? All the colors are mixed up.”

“It’s beautiful, pal.” I held the clear, plastic baseball up and wondered if I could rearrange the sand. I twisted the cap, but it was hot-glued and tacky to touch, “Your dad will love it!”

“No, it isn’t good, Mom. Look at Cal’s.” He kicked his leg back and forth and picked at a glob of glittery glue on the tabletop.

Cal, my son’s cousin and best friend, sat at the workbench and poured a scoop of florescent green sand into a funnel. He chose a football instead of a baseball, and worked with elfish attention to detail.

He mapped out the design in his mind, picked his colors deliberately, and in long slow intervals added layer after layer of dyed sand. He squished his cheek on the workbench, and fixed an apprentice’s eye on the shiny specs that drained into the hourglass.

He overheard our conversation, but continued his work. He selected snowy white for the final layer and looked at us. His best buddy sat with his chin in his hand.

Cal completed his endeavor and handed the football to the silver-haired lady elf. Her apron had two red-striped pockets. She holstered candy canes in one and her hot glue gun in the other. She adhered the top of Calvin’s handiwork, “Nice job,” she chirped, “you would make a fine helper for Santa.” Calvin smiled and joined his cousin at the sticky table.

“Hi,” my son said, “yours came out perfect. Look at mine.” He plunked his baseball down.

“I like yours,” Cal put his arm around his friend’s shoulders, “do you want to trade? You can have mine and I’ll keep yours because I think it’s really good.”

I looked at his mom and gasped. She placed her hand over her heart.

“Really? Okay, I’ll trade! Hey Mom,” my son jumped out of his seat holding the pink, blue, green, red, yellow and orange football high in the air, “look what Cal gave me!”

“That is so nice of him. I hope you thanked him.”

My boy dashed back to the table, gave Cal a high five and the two friends ran off to explore the rest of Wonderland.

I watched them and my heart opened and ached with gratitude to witness such a moment of authentic generosity.

“That,” I said to Cal’s mom, “was true Christmas spirit.” We laughed at our tears and wiped them away, “I love him so much,” she said, “I just want to kiss his face off.”

This child’s inherent kindness was remarkable. Empathy and generosity flow freely in him; it seemed natural to give away what he had worked so hard to perfect. He practiced what some refer to in Yoga as the unification of the heart, mind and hands.

Yoga translates to mean “unite”, and one of the goals is to quiet the mind so that we may hear what lives in the heart and then express it to others.

The Heart Chakra (Anahata) houses empathy, compassion and forgiveness. It is the seat of our loving relationships.

The Crown Chakra (Sahasrara) is our connection to a higher power. It provided the inspiration for Calvin’s gift, but one needs a strong sense of self and peaceful heart to act on inspiration.

And the Throat Chakra (Vishuddha) is the expression of who we are. Its energy is contagious and reveals the way our actions have a ripple effect in the world.

Our day in Santa’s Village was filled with the pandemonium any adventure with three young children provides: glove losses, runny noses, jackets zipping, jungle gyms, head bumps, decorated cookies, sugar highs, gentle scoldings, kisses for any and all achievements, and ultimately the noiseless exhaustion that delights mothers.

We checked into our hotel and swung open the doors to our connecting rooms. The boys changed into superhero pajamas and jumped on the bed while Cal’s little sister, Sadie (whom we call Sassafras), snuggled in between her mom and I in the next room. We read a book and listened to the boys demonstrate Karate moves.

“Hey Cal,” my son shouted, “’I’ll never forget this day for the rest of my life!”

Once again, Cal’s mom and I caught teary eyes and put our hands over our hearts. Then we laughed as hard as our two little super heroes.

The next afternoon, we packed our bags and prepared for a long drive home. Cal came into our room and placed the baseball next to the football, “I think I like mine. Can we switch back?” he asked.

“Okay. I kind of like mine too,” my son said, “hey, let’s go play with flashlights.”

It didn’t matter which sandy globe he went home with because the gift was not the thing. The gift was the moment, that exchange of the Earth’s abundant sand that touched each of us and burnished an extraordinary understanding of generosity in my boy.

The holiday season provides each of us with the opportunity to cast an eye inward, welcome our highest inspiration, and be an apprentice in the moment.

For more of Marylee check out her previous articles, “I Hate Headstands” and “Letter from a Bully, and Where Sleigh Bells Ring.”

About Marylee Fairbanks

Marylee Fairbanks is a columnist for Gaiam, elephant journal, My Life Yoga, and Bliss.com, Her essays explore Motherhood and yoga, but mainly focus on her experiences with her young son and the many ways he helps her grow. She is a registered yoga teacher and founder of Chakras Yoga and The 24 Things. She teaches Chakras Balancing workshops and yoga classes. Prior to having her son, she performed in Broadway musicals across the country. Marylee lives in Massachusetts with her husband, son, and dogs. Find her on her website and follow her on twitter.

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14 Responses to “Kids These Days.”

  1. Laurie says:

    Wow! Now I'm holding my heart with tears in my eyes. Thanks for reminding me what Christmas is about. Great article

  2. Magatte Wade says:

    Simply beautiful!

  3. Great article, Marylee. Love having you at Elephant.

    I'll look forward to the next one.

    Bob W.
    Yoga Editor

  4. Lisa B. says:

    Beautiful story summed up by six simple words, “the gift was not the thing.” Thank you for that little piece of holiday spirit.

  5. [...] more of Marylee check out her previous articles I Hate Handstands, Letter From A Bully, and The Apprentices Gift. ChakrasYoga.com Yoga helps me to notice and give meaning to small things in my life. It urges [...]

  6. [...] Marylee’s other pieces; Sing Out, Clara, Letter From A Bully, I Hate Handstands, The Apprentices Gift, and Where Sleigh Bells Ring. Yoga began for me as a respite from the physical celebration [...]

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