Isn’t it remarkable how we can subtlety feel when someone is judging us or someone else?
It’s almost as if there’s a stuck-ness, a clog in the air. Something’s messing with the flow. Some kind of preconceived theory is getting in the way of natural rhythm — the conversing, the creating, the being.
It’s hard to be ourselves around people who hold us to that preconceived notion, refusing to let us reveal our true selves. They’re too busy assuming they know everything about us to listen to what we have to say. They might even be staring at us like we aren’t worthy of their time or energy, or even air.
Some look at us like we’re purely an interruption to the awesomeness that is their lives.
As we talk, some people judge the shit out of us — about things they “know” about us, things they “think” about us, even as we’re talking — I don’t know about you, but when I feel that from people, it throws me off, sometimes causing me to forget what I was even talking about (yet usually keeps me nervously rambling — giving them something more to judge, no doubt!)
Isn’t it worse when we sit uncomfortably in front of someone who we think is judging us, when in fact they aren’t, and it’s all in our heads? How do we know the difference between an intuition and a made-up story in our minds? What’s more, isn’t amazing how we can feel when someone is looking at us without one ounce of judgment? Just total love, acceptance and encouragement. That feeling when people smile with a genuine knowing of how great you really are.
I like that feeling.
I like to stir that in others, by looking at them with utmost admiration — no matter who or what someone is, they deserve to be looked at like they matter, listened to because they’re important and loved because they are love.
We all must give each other the freedom to make mistakes, to learn from them, to move on and to create amazing things in life — no matter how much we may have messed up in the past — or how much we will at some other point in life!
So, how will you look at the next person you see?
Tammy M. Carew is currently an A.D.D. writer, meaning she writes in random bursts of creativity, because she can’t sit still long enough to finish one of the dozen-or-so books she has started. (But will someday — just watch!) This is why her blog is such a freakin’ mess— but full of self-proclaimed wisdom, humor, experience, and most of all, love. She has studied yogic philosophy and enlightenment for the past year and just started her yoga teacher training in September 2011. She is a mother of two, a lover to one and is in love with her dog and dove. She absolutely loves elephant journal for all its delicious people and wisdom. Follow her on Twitter.
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July’s Full Moon in Capricorn: The Heart wants what it Wants. The 4 Stages of a Good Divorce. How to Love a Woman who Scares You. Our Soulmates are Rarely Who We Expect. I Still Think of You. Men, Let’s Stop Fooling Ourselves: Size Matters. To the One Who Tried to Break Me. An Open Letter to the Fixers. How your Stored Memories in the Amygdala can lead to PTSD. How My Sister’s Death Transformed my Self-Perception.