I have a confession to make.
This week a Facebook friend won an awesome prize. I was happy for her, but also felt some sort of discomfort in my feelings. They just weren’t authentic.
I was taken aback by this and knew I had to explore deeper to uncover the “why” of it.
“How could you not be happy for her? Geez, what an ungrateful b*** you are Jan. C’mon are you kidding me? Look at what she’s been through; she deserves some joy.”
All these thoughts, and more, ran through my head.
Alternately, sitting on my other shoulder, ungrateful gremlin kept saying stuff like, “Well I’ve been through a lot too. I work hard, I deserve it too.”
Welcome to the pity party that was in my head. Geesh.
Thankfully, because I’ve learned so much from my coaching, I recognized my insecurity and called it out fairly quickly.
“Ok, pity party’s over folks. Move on. Nothing to see here.”
That was basically the conversation in my head after I took the time to process my feelings.
Flipping the perspective allowed me the ability to share in her joy and to be grateful for her gift. I was putting negative energy out into my world and it was coming right back to me like a magnet because what you reap you sow.
I felt rather ashamed of myself for my feelings but, hey, I’m a human being human and there will be mistakes.
My big take away on this whole thing?
The universe is a most glorious place and every breath we take offers us a choice on how we want to show up.
Me, I want to be authentic, mistakes and all.
How about you?
Editor: Brianna Bemel