Rumi lied to me.

Via on May 25, 2012

Out beyond ideas
of wrong doings and right doings
there is a field.
I’ll meet you there.

~Rumi

~

And she never came.

I went out into the blonde hay field and waited in the sun, my skin baking pleasantly

we drink to die we drink tonight

After awhile I opened the picnic basket

drank the cool white wine

got a headache

fell asleep

and woke up to dream world

and I realized that all the noise out in the city

the hum down the hill of people in bars, trying to fuck one another

is sad and empty and everything you want that you don’t have if and when you have it you won’t want it you’ll just be a part of the hum down the hill the noise in the city thousands of whispers and yells and bellows, all chalk on the black board

I unfriended her on facebook

after she unfriended me in real life

she’s addicted to love

and by love she means elephant gun

take the big king down

pain is a drug

an addiction I’ve never had the misfortune to buy into

I’m alone

I like myself

so instead of the big party tonight

with the same people and a few new people and the chance of meeting someone and yelling and bellowing and whispering, instead of joining the hummers down the hill all trying to fuck one another

I’ll work at building a house of cards

a sand castle on the beach

and if I save one sentient being one minute of unnecessary suffering

I’ll be able to die sad

and wake early, in time to go buy my dog a bunch of local left over dog bones

at the farmers market

my local farmers market

the one that no longer allows dogs

but is happy to take my money.

Who knew it was so easy to be so bitter, and alone, so young?

Soon I will see my black coal heart crushed completely

by the cynicism of selfish wallflowers (with their wedding rings in their pockets)

but, one golden morning, I’ll pull a diamond out of the empty space

where my black coal heart used to be.

 

~

A Friday Night Poem.

Waylon Hart Lewis.

May 25th, a perfectly cool blue black breezy evening, 2012.

Boulder, Colorado.

~

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About Waylon Lewis

Waylon Lewis, founder of elephant magazine, now elephantjournal.com & host of Walk the Talk Show with Waylon Lewis, is a 1st generation American Buddhist “Dharma Brat." Voted #1 in U.S. on twitter for #green two years running, Changemaker & Eco Ambassador by Treehugger, Green Hero by Discovery’s Planet Green, Best (!) Shameless Self-Promoter at Westword's Web Awards, Prominent Buddhist by Shambhala Sun, & 100 Most Influential People in Health & Fitness 2011 by "Greatist", Waylon is a mediocre climber, lazy yogi, 365-day bicycle commuter & best friend to Redford (his rescue hound). His aim: to bring the good news re: "the mindful life" beyond the choir & to all those who didn't know they gave a care. elephantjournal.com | facebook.com/elephantjournal | twitter.com/elephantjournal | facebook.com/waylonhlewis | twitter.com/waylonlewis | Google+ For more: publisherelephantjournalcom

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21 Responses to “Rumi lied to me.”

  1. elephantjournal says:

    A friend just left this as a comment on my FB Wall, in response to the above:

    “The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.”
    ~ Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

  2. elcarg says:

    Honest thoughts out in the world, how refreshing. Love you, brother.

  3. mohan says:

    Lovely mate. The one turning and burning diamond all over this. Surely lovers of God are the greatest of drunkards.

  4. I agree…it's the struggle, the loss, digging out that makes you beautiful and compassionate. Don't sell yourself short on that coal black heart part. I think it's been through enough that most people who know you know it's already a diamond.

    P.S: I love that in the midst of raw, bittersweet, beautiful and sad you managed to get one more dig in at the farmer's market.

  5. lindajane says:

    thank you for your beautiful, candid words.

  6. faye says:

    The greatest worth is self-mastery.
    The greatest quality is seeking to serve others.
    The greatest precept is continual awareness.
    The greatest medicine is the emptiness of everything.
    The greatest action is not conforming with the worlds ways.
    The greatest magic is transmuting the passions.
    The greatest generosity is non-attachment.
    The greatest goodness is a peaceful mind.
    The greatest patience is humility.
    The greatest effort is not concerned with results.
    The greatest meditation is a mind that lets go.
    The greatest wisdom is seeing through appearances.
    ~Atisha

    I believe that in the pursuit of these greatness's, we come face to face to that which hinders it within us. working through these "road blocks" with a loving kindness to ourselves do we with every step, word and movement come closer and closer to living a life that is truly worth living for it is the only one for you and, therefore, for others. i believe fully in the process of everything, one that you, Waylon, express so well in words. and that's why i read e. journal. chapeau, Mr. Lewis. chapeau.

  7. Meredith says:

    That's pretty.

  8. Kristi says:

    Rumi never lies. The field lies within. And with the right person. xoxo

  9. Yes, Waylon! This dark night poem is so harshly beautiful. The last lines, zing! "but, one golden morning, I’ll pull a diamond out of the empty space where my black coal heart used to be."

    When I reached an apex of despair, the place where I gave up the idea that anything in this world had the power to make me happy or sad, I woke up to the truth that I am always at peace (with dashes of delight) in the still depths of being.

    A poem for you, by me:

    After the Party

    I woke one day
    to the first sober
    light, the glint
    of truth
    in a dull
    sky.

    This light,
    bore no warmth,
    no hint
    of benevolence.

    Instead, inglorious,
    the dawn cast a cold
    brilliance, a harsh
    reminder of what
    was lost.

    All the abandon
    in the world,
    all the revelry
    cannot forever
    keep me –with the
    lure of pleasure—
    from joy.

    This masquerade
    never really began.
    I dreamed the mask
    and in the steel
    of this new day,
    I awake faceless.

    I always thought
    God was kinder.

    Lori Lothian
    May 16, 2010

  10. Swami bruce says:

    Whoa, Waylon, you're harshing my mellow. I am going to recite a Rumi poem today as I officiate a wedding between a beautiful Persian woman and a first generation Japanese-American man. Don't try to spoil it! But thanks for the poem.

  11. [...] Waylon Lewis okumayı seviyorum. Geçenlerde bir yazısında ”Rumî Bana Yalan Söyledi” demiş… Biliyorum. Bana da yalan söyledi Rumî !!! Sonra başımı önümdeki kitaba eğiyorum, Lady Hamilton ile Amiral Nelson’ın kaçak aşkına, fonda yanardağlar, sömürgeci İngiltere, Napoli ve Güney İtalya… Başımı kaldırıyorum bir ara, alabildiğine yemyeşil tepeler dağlar yükseliyor gözümün önünde ta bulutlara kadar. Sonra dönüş yolunda bugün dolu ve yağmur, çılgın bir turkuaz gri deniz feribotla geçerken… Her yer pırıl pırıl… Bütün gün böyleydim. Kafam kah şimdiki zamanda, anda, kah geçmişin sayfalarında, kah zıplamış kendince bir yarının dünyasını kurgulamış, hepsi saçma, hiçbiri gerçek değil… Sonra kendi ayak seslerimden bile duyduğum rahatsızlık… dolu ve yağmurun motor kaskındaki tıpırtısı, tıpkı sualtında dalıştayken dışarıda yağmur yağması gibi… Sualtını özlemediğimi farketmek ardından… derken tekrar yağmurun tıpırtısına, doğanın renklerine dönmek, bir motorun arka selesinde otururken hızla zamanı yara yara bir kurşun gibi geçmek gitmek.. [...]

  12. Breathtakingly brilliant words. The intense pain of heartbreak will rip you open and the most painful part is saying goodbye to that person inside you who always dreamed of what might be…. And now… all you're left with is being awake with yourself … and for me… being awake has been the most painful heartbreaking process of all… but there's no turning back once eyes have been opened to this new reality.. and so I move forward attempting to create a new existence & dream. Thank you for sharing Waylon.

  13. [...] keep going, And then we are in a space Where he can run free, And off he goes, Running and running as fast as he can; Through the trees and the creek, Chasing [...]

  14. [...] of my favorite poems by Rumi says… “Today, like every other day, we wake up empty 
and frightened. Don’t open the [...]

  15. Wandering Dervish says:

    I love this poem of yours. The title caught my attention as I had discovered Rumi back in 96 and couldn’t get enough of his poetry, hence my email name, Wandering Dervish stems from my love of Rumi’s poetry even today. I’ve bought many of his translated works from different authors. “Like This” is one of my favorite poems. And the Illuminated Rumi is a beautiful rendition of his work combined with beautiful imagery. I have on several occasions sent the same words from the heading of your poem to a few lovers and friends in the past, “out beyond ideas of wrong doings and right doings there is a field. I’ll meet you there”, to provoke thoughts.

    I’ve found a lot of poetry is written in a way that distances the words from the writer as to not make it so personal, possibly to avoid feeling vulnerable again by sharing painful personal experience out to the world that can be subject of judgement bringing even more hurt on a tender subject already. Some people think broken heart poetry is taboo or too mushy. But, I love Rumi for his guts to speak about what we’ve all felt when what we desire never comes to fruition, a broken heart that suffers alone that only time can heal or a loss never recovered instead silently mutates us deep inside. This is how I felt when reading your poem. You captured it well with such creativity, using words like paint on a canvas to fill the readers head with strong imagery as Rumi seemed to always do.

  16. mjenniferm says:

    i wish we lived in the same town. a place we could meet out beyond the farmer’s market the buzzing and humming. i’ll bring the picnic basket full of my green hot curry getting cold and the vegetables from my garden that the person i picked them for never will see because he unpicnicked me and didn’t bother to tell me. he sent his absence and silence instead. and so i have a basket filled with hopes and dreams and no strings and am happy to picnic it on my own but it would be nice to share it with someone who knows what it means to experience something beyond silence.

  17. Gloria says:

    Thank You Waylon. You are lovely. Your work is beautiful.

    With appreciation,

    Gloria

  18. Genny Pearl says:

    Love this and love Beirut!

  19. Cissy says:

    This post made me smile and cry and ironically long for love and Rumi. Rumi didn’t lie but I’m so glad you didn’t either because this piece is perfect for how the disappointment feels and how tragic it can feel and be. Beautiful. Thank you. It’s raw and beautiful. I don’t know you I don’t think a heartless soul could have touched me so deeply.

  20. LisaB says:

    Goodness. You just put a nice lump in my throat and it’s only 7am. I would help you create a book volume of your poetry and publish it on Amazon.

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