Fifty Shades of F*cked-Up. ~ Trista Hendren

Via on Jun 22, 2012
Photo credit: Ira Gelb

I will admit that E L James is a clever businesswoman, but while reading Fifty Shades of Grey, I had to wonder if she was somehow compensated by the Republican National Convention.

Anastasia Steele is everything a good conservative looks for in a woman; most importantly submissive and virginal.

Let me start by saying, I am extremely liberal.

Whatever floats your boat sexually is fine. I believe we as women should celebrate our sexuality however we f*cking want to.

However, there was nothing celebratory about the sex in Fifty Shades of Grey.

The outright abuse in this trilogy is disturbing, especially considering how well it is selling.

Christian Grey is everything I never want for my daughter.

Yet, he is all the things women are taught to look for, even at the expense of maintaining a dysfunctional relationship.

Wealthy and good-looking seem to overpower sadistic, controlling and abusive.

He begins by scolding and ordering for his “submissive.” As with most abusers, he starts small and works his way up. He stalks her and won’t let his “submissive” touch him. He leads her into numerous crying fits.

Does this sound like a relationship you want to be in?

I won’t go on and on because there are many good articles already published on elephant journal, including:

Power, Sex & Fairy Tales: Decoding the Popularity of Fifty Shades of Grey. ~Kate Bartolotta

Why Twihards Shouldn’t Be Reading Fifty Shades. ~Cassandra Smith

10 Reasons Why Fifty Shades of Grey should never Tie any Self-Respecting Woman Down. ~Waylon Lewis

50 Shades of Bullsh*t: Misogynistic Subtext & Poor Prose? ~Chrispy (Bhagat Singh)

However, before you plop down $30 for the trilogy, let me give you some quotes so you can decide for yourself if this is really something you want to absorb into your being.

Stalker, my subconscious whispers at me through the cloud of tequila that’s still floating in my brain, but somehow, because it’s him, I don’t mind.” (62)

Desire. This is desire. This is what it feels like.” (68)

“I think I’m in shock. My subconscious has emigrated or been struck dumb or simply keeled over and expired. I am numb. I can observe and absorb but not articulate my feelings about all this, because I’m in shock….Fear…yes…that seems to be the overriding feeling. I recognize it now. But weirdly not of him—I don’t think he’d hurt me, well, not without my consent.” (99)

“…so you’ll let me exert my will over you. I will gain a great deal of pleasure, joy, even, in your submission. The more you submit, the greater my joy—it’s a very simple equation.” (101)

“This is not a man I want to cross…ever.” (139)

“This is what it will be like if I sign, him ordering me around. I frown. Do I want this? Reaching for my knife and fork, I tentatively cut into the venison. It’s very tasty.” (155)

“The Dominant reserves the right to dismiss the Submissive from his service at any time and for any reason. The Submissive may request hr release at any time, such request to be granted at the discretion of the Dominant…” (167)

“The Dominant may use the Submissive’s body at any time during the Allotted Times or any agreed additional times in any manner he deems fit, sexually or otherwise.” (168)

“Following my more thorough examination of your issues, may I bring to your attention the definition of submissive. Submissive [suhb-mis-iv]—adjective. Origin: 1580-90; submiss+ -ive. Synonyms: 1 tractable, compliant, amenable. 2 passive, resigned, patient, docile, tame, subdued. “(208)

“Oh, how demeaning is this? Demeaning and scary and hot. He’s making such a meal of this. My heart is in my mouth. I can barely breathe. Sh*t, is this going to hurt?” (274)

“I will spank you each time you do it, do you understand?”…he hits me—hard. Ow! My eyes spring open in response to the pain and I try to rise, but his hand moves between my shoulder blades, keeping me down. He caresses me again where he’s hit me, and his breathing’s changed—it’s louder, harsher. He hits me again and again, quickly in succession. Holy f*ck it hurts. I try to make no sound, my face screwed up against the pain. I try to wriggle away from the blows—spurred on by adrenaline spiking and coursing through my body.” (274)

“Is he worthy of me? That’s an interesting concept. I always wonder whether I am worthy of him.” (279)

“…if you were mine, you wouldn’t be able to sit down for a week after the stunt you pulled yesterday. He said it then and all I could concentrate on at the time was being his. All the warning signs were there. I was just too clueless and too enamored to notice.” (280)

“I want him to stay because he wants to stay with me, not because I’m a blubbering mess, and I don’t want him to beat me, is that so unreasonable?” (286)

“I like the control it gives me, Anastasia. I want you to behave in a particular way, and if you don’t, I shall punish you, and you will learn to behave the way I desire. I enjoy punishing you…I need to control you.” (287)

“I oblige immediately, feeling like I’m exiting my body.” (322)

“I don’t want to lose him. In spite of all his demands, his need to control, his scary vices, I have never felt as alive as I do now. It’s a thrill to be sitting here beside him. He’s so unpredictable, sexy, smart, and funny. But his moods…oh—and he wants to hurt me.” (355)

“…I allow myself to fantasize that he loves me…I’m careful not to touch his chest but just snuggle in his arms…” (356)

“This is so…I want to think wrong, but somehow it’s not. It’s right for Christian. It’s what he wants—and after the last few days…after all he’s done, I have to man up and take whatever he decides he wants, whatever he thinks he needs.” (484)

“Don’t start with your smart mouth in here, Miss Steele. Or I will f*ck it with you on your knees. Do you understand?” (486)

“I close myself, bracing myself for the blow. It comes hard, snapping across my backside, and the bite of the belt is everything I fear…His breathing is ragged and harsh, whereas mine is almost nonexistent as I desperately scrabble around my psyche looking for some internal strength. The belt cuts into my flesh again…ow the tears are streaming down my face. I don’t want to cry. It angers me that I am crying. He hits me again….as the blistering pain cuts across me again, and I hear him drop the belt behind me, and he’s pulling me into his arms, all breathless and compassionate….” (506)

Fifty Shades of Grey ends with the word grief.

Grief is right.

If you let a man purchase your very soul, grief is exactly what you will get.

I don’t care how much money someone has, this is not worth it. The dream of having a man take care of us will end in our destruction. These “sexy” stories may be tantalizing, but they don’t fit anywhere into a healthy sexuality.

And, if you believe in The Law of Attraction, you know that what you give your attention to is what manifests itself in your life. Multiply that by the millions of women (and men) who are reading the trilogy and we have quite a problem on our hands.

Don’t support abuse.

Don’t propagate the victimization of young women with your money.

Send your $30 to a women’s shelter.

If Fifty Shades continues to sell this well, they will soon need the money—desperately.

 

Editor: Jamie Morgan

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About Trista Hendren

Trista Hendren is the author of The Girl God. The second book in this series, Mother Earth, will be published in December. You can read more about her project with Elisabeth Slettnes at www.thegirlgod.com.

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48 Responses to “Fifty Shades of F*cked-Up. ~ Trista Hendren”

  1. Benjamin says:

    OMG. Sick. I'm in an online class for my nursing bachelor's while I just received my associates.

    This class, Modes of Understanding culture and politics, asks a question: How we define masculinity.

    My response:

    I consider myself a feminist. Yes, you can be one as a male. My view of masculinity is that it's corrupt, and has been wrong since the industrial revolution… longer even. What is masculinity in America? Being tough, not crying, being emotionally detached, dominant, competitive. Let's not forget that we love sex and can't get enough, so the capitalist indoctrination goes. I have three daughters. We will have one more. We want only girls. Everyone asks me if I'm going to keep trying "for your boy". As if who I am as a man is defined by having a male offspring. So frustrating. I've disregarded the shallow views we hold so dear in America long ago. So, to me, being truly masculine is being a present and emotionally available father and husband. It means raising my daughters to be strong minded, educated, and able to make informed decisions on their own, to never be dependent on a man, but should they choose to be in a relationship, they will expect it to be equal, and not dominant/submissive.

    Fuck this book. I don't use that word often. But reading the quotes above made me sick.

    • Xiba! says:

      Hello Benjamin,

      Off topic, but you comment made me think of it. Have you heard of the White Ribbon Campaign and The Good Men Project/Jeff Perera? If not, you might find them interesting, as their view of masculinity and the role modern men play in the world seems quite like yours.

      Xiba!

  2. Katie B. says:

    I’m severely disgusted by 50 SoG. There is NO dichotomy between being feminist and being either Dominant OR submissive – but there is a damned huge one between being abusive and either feminist OR kinky! Your preferences in the bedroom don’t have a gods damned thing to do with your politics – but the politics AND the abusiveness of 50 Shades of Grey are revolting.

    I am Katie, I am a submissive, and I AM FUCKING WELL A FEMINIST.

  3. Lilbudha says:

    I am not a professional psychiatrist but I am going to suggest that anyone who gets off on causing pain or needing pain to get off has some serious issues that need to be addressed. What you do in your bedroom says everything about you. It says where you come from, what you need to work on , and what your neuroses are. I know people who engage in this lifestyle and they are some seriously messed up folks. They never seem to be settled. Always looking for the next BDSM fix like crackheads looking thru cast away crack bottles. It's all very weird, very inorganic to the human experience, and pathological. But go ahead and waste your cash.

  4. minnie says:

    Wowee. I have not read these books. I have no interest. I have a degree in psych. I spent over a year and a half of my life researching, intervieing and getting to know people, and professionals in the BDSM world. Many in the top of this world. I found them to be some of the most intelligent, genuine and caring people I've ever met. Yes – many many many people who have some deeper issue (and who the FUCK doesn't?) gravitate toward this lifestyle choice rather unconciously and thus, maybe as "lilbudha" says here : "pathilogical, seriously messed up etc." (incredible compassion coming from someone naming themselves "lilbudha" btw. How that is to be judged as any more "fucked up" than the person reaching for another beer, indulging their inner critic or what other "neuroses" every human being grapples with…makes me question how informed ANY of the knee jerk judgments of BDSM on a whole are. I spent YEARS in the "spiritual – yoga – meditation communities.." I would rather hand with the people I met in the BDSM crowd ANY day. I found FAR more sanity on a whole there than I have EVER encountered in the "spiritual" community. I think ANYONE who is judging this lifestyle (judge the books…that's fine….from what I gather they are shallow and uniformed as to the deeper path many people do CHOOSE to follow and grow from in the BDSM world are on) but HOLY MOSES…rein in your judgments of a lifestyle choice that I would bet very few of you have ever spent any time truly understanding or participating in any healthy way in.

  5. Nicole says:

    Thank you so much for writing this … and for posting the other articles that wonderful people have written about it as well… when I had read a synopsis my initial reaction was that this was the case – but I didn't know for sure, just suspected. What absolute insanity and bullshit. Like you said, give your $30 to a woman's shelter.

  6. Helene says:

    why anyone would read this crap is beyond logical..it seems like a bad dysfunctional romance novel…it's the equivalent in my opinion to watching porn, buit since its a book it makes it ok for women tof have their " dirty little secret" . I just took two Ray Bradbury books out of the library…some good old fashioned storeytelling!!! The suggestion to donate your money to a woman's shelter is spot on….thanks for the article

  7. Ley44 says:

    A Thesaurus is a better read. The repetition was 'heady'. He was abused, poor man.YAWN! The insecure & young female and the anti-social 1%er, having her come to rescue his soul before he is subject to burn in fire and brimstone becomes this 'fairytale' ..Really? I am in a very healthy TPE relationship. I maintain my independance & freedom. He is my mentor. His life is devoted to securing the rights of employees & their families. It amazes me how many women bought into this.Where I work, we sold out in 2 weeks, 20 copies of each book.Followed by sales of rope & handcuffs. I wonder how many women ended up at the emergency room, or men. A grown man groveling at anyone's feet made my stomach turn. I believe in strong people who nurture theirselves & each other. I believe in honest, loving, & strong communication. I emplore anyone who reads things like these to do some research. There are strong D/s relationships & they have nothing to do with the sort of ideas invoked by scribblings like this. Love yourself & with that love for all comes as a bonus. Namaste~

  8. rima says:

    when i first heard of the books i could not understand what the fuss was all about. so, i borrowed the first book from a friend and tried to read it. but i just could not bring myself to go beyond the elaborate description of the contract….its disgusting, soooooo demeaning of women. i live in india, where these books have become a huge success and so it only scares me to think of the kind of people who enjoy this poorly written, sadistic piece of s**t. it saddens me that books like this even get published, its just so tacky and the writing is below average. the way ana is projected seems to imply that no matter how sensible and normal a woman seems to be, even in this age, all we want, is to submit to a dominant male and meekly suffer his oppression and subjugation…also, the media played a big role in further propagating this view by constantly fussing over the books…this makes no sense… i think even the twilight books are better than this…atleast i could read through the first two of those!!

    • Sue says:

      Glad to read your comment here! You’re probably the only one who has read at least 1 book! How is everyone judging without even reading it?! Don’t we live in a not so perfect word or what?! This can happen to anyone! I have read all 3 books & I must say this is not what you all think it is! This is a story of a couple of fell in love & struggling to cope with the guy’s history. I think theirs beautiful & I suggest anyone who wants to write about, read it first!!!! Then say whatever you need to say, otherwise don’t write useless opinions.

  9. Clarity says:

    Although I’ve only read the first book, I think you’re only looking at it at face value. I don’t think that this book actually encourages or promotes women to be in a sexually or otherwise abusive relationship. You have to remember that in the book, Christian Grey made love to Ana Steele before they ever began their “agreement.” He makes the point several times that she can get out of it at any time and they did discuss the details of the contract. Also, I think it’s worth mentioning that Christian Grey had problems and abuse that MADE him the way he is. Not that it’s excusable, but you can’t completely make that character a monster. I think that the point of 50 Shades is more about a woman discovering her sexuality in positive and negative ways. The book sells because women can live Ana’s life vicariously. Just my opinion.

    • Muks says:

      Well, which criminal was never MADE the way he or she is? Do you think the parents of mass murderers have always been loving and generous to them? There's is NO excuse to treat other people that way. It is a crime.

  10. She says:

    I haven't read the books, but reading the quotes I'd say the author had no idea what she was talking about. The main character is not a sub, she is someone experimenting because the man she is attracted to is very Dominant. It is not uncommon for people to try out the lifestyle, but she is not really attracted to it. It seems like the Author saw an opportunity and did their research on the superficial aspects. But having no actual affinity for the lifestyle the "Why"s totally escape their comprehension. I'm more disgusted by the misrepresentation of the BDSM relationship that has found its way into mainstream popular media than anything.

  11. Slightly says:

    Comparing the BDSM lifestyle and spousal abuse is erroneous at best. Abuse takes power from, BDSM gives power to.
    Please, do a little research before painting perfectly normal people with a brush of Puritanism.

    I’ve read the books, straight through. The only part about it I found offensive in the least is the prevailing idea that people interested in the BDSM lifestyle are sick.
    I have many friends in the lifestyle, Doms, subs, Dommes, brats, sams, you name it. Not one of them believes they are sick.
    Now, some of the character interactions are annoying, the older female had obviously read *The Story of O* and maybe *Behind the Green Door* and thought she knew the scene, and used it to justify her behavior.

    The Main Character ‘Christian’ had obviously done his research better, and aside from his blindspot where she was concerned, was a very proper, if bit over the top, bookread, Dom.

    I am a female, and consider myself a feminist. I did not find this book series to have Republican undertones for one really really big reason.

    The book describes, Consent.
    The Republicans don’t want their women to have consent, because that implies that they are actually human.

    While the books aren’t my favorite books of the Genre, and I much much much prefer the Marketplace books by author Laura Antoniou, I think it is about time that sex, sexuality, and the enjoyment therein becomes a talking point, and an active part of our sadly repressed society.

    Perhaps if more women allowed themselves to be wantonly sexual, I don’t mean just as subs, please, female Dommes are every bit as powerful as male Doms, the world would become a more peaceful, less stressful place to live in.

  12. love says:

    I find the political statements by the author of the article as offensive as the book itself- Politics, like sex, is complex. Reducing people down to their political ideas is oppressive and discriminating, you are not progressive, you are narrow-minded.

  13. Shae_Tiann says:

    I couldn't even read more than 10 of those quotes; too much burning rage to continue. Who the fuck in their right mind would enjoy that? Who would enjoy READING that shit?

  14. Jamie Morgan! Thank you for such a great piece of, well, clarity…

  15. Oops, I mean Tristan Hendren–and Jamie, great editing I am sure.

  16. I am so LOL at myself…I have head cold from hell from my kids. Let me also add this piece, close title to TRISTA's great piece. http://www.yoganonymous.com/fifty-shades-of-holy-

  17. paul mccue says:

    hey trista
    you hit the proverbial nail on the head
    why people are buying such trash is indicative of the kind of society we are living in (a friend gave me a copy and i had to bin it after 10 pages – something i never do) – let’s just remember how great things were in the 40′s -50′s – 60′s (and be4) – this is one twisted tale of erotica for the mentally disturbed.
    yea, let’s spend the money elsewhere – like on a woman’s shelter or a library in Africa – or maybe just on a day out with our kids – who needs this crap -let’s all boycott 50 shades of grey
    no time like the present
    your pal
    pAUL

  18. Mymlen says:

    I'm surprised to see all the hateful comments. It's simply not OK to label other people's sexuality as sick. Just because YOU wouldn't want to engage in BDSM, does that mean it's OK to judge people who do?

    I get the feeling a lot of the comments stem from a poor understanding of what BDSM is. Fifty Shades of Grey is not representative in any way, so please do not use it to label BDSM as a whole. Yes, Fifty Shades is problematic , and that should be discussed, but that does not mean it's OK to pass judgments on sexuality that is based on consent and openness. Abuse and BDSM is simply not the same. E.L. James probably should have done some research before she wrote, but that also goes for a lot of the people who comment on this article. And the author. I think she means well, but she mixes things up.

    BDSM is not abuse, it is not opposed to feminism, it is not a diagnosis, and people should be respectful of that.

    • Trista Hendren says:

      I do not have a problem with BDSM and did not even mention BDSM. This is not an article about BDSM. It is an article about Fifty Shades of Grey. I have a problem with the book, which I find abusive towards women. "Consent" is a slippery slope with young, inexperienced women who are swayed by money.

      The only intent behind the article is for people to know what they were buying. I believe this book as been mislabeled.

      • Mymlen says:

        I agree that the book is harmful and problematic, and my comment is mostly directed to other commentators. And to be fair, I may also have been influenced by other articles that have been written on this subject, because there is a tendency for some people to use this book to bash BDSM lifestyles.

        That said, maybe I did react a bit to harshly to what YOU wrote. Because I do agree that Fifty Shades depict abuse, and that should NOT be considered hot and exciting. However, I did react to some of the quotes, because some of them do not in themselves point to abuse. "Dirty talk" and "humiliation" can be part of consensual relationships. The reason why they are abusive in Fifty Shades, is the context. Not the phrases in themselves. That's why I said you mixed things up – but I must again point out that my comment was mostly directed at other commentators.

        One of the reasons why Fifty Shades can do harm, is that it paints a picture of a bad boy that can be redeemed. That idea is sometimes what keeps women in abusive relationships.

  19. Alex Dallas says:

    The quotes cited are merely reinforcement of the general global view that exists towards women. We live in a world where women and girls are at risk of domestic and sexual violence every single day.A world where one in four women been assaulted, sexually harassed or date raped, where chiLdren are sexually assaulted by people known to them..this has become so normal that it is astounding. This pathetic attempt at erotica using womens’ pain for commerical profit is Sickening. This is not judgement of peoples’ sexual desires. Until I leave in a world where to be female no longer equates with tyranny and abuse from men then I belive this sort of unmitigated exploitation of both vulnerable men and women is A vile trade in unashamed pimpinG of So called literature for monetary gain with no care or thought for the terrible harm it may cause.

  20. Lola says:

    Curiously, before suckering up to the Grey frenzy, I began to read blogs written by slightly more mature and experienced women who don't seem to be very happy with the idea of "liberation" via delusional obsession for "bad" men, where some might say the author is harmfully mismatching women's need for hot kink with men who mistreat and disrespect women with MASTER manipulation in ploys and plots with bling and power. Previously suckered women through the decades have been trying to educate future suckers by defining liberation to separate kink from gradual, then long-term abuse. Do I really want to spoil this author if all this book does is confuse the easy readers that want a simple door to fulfill submission fantasies? ~Lola (having been married to an abusive man for 20 years and watching my own daughter fall prey to the same… kind of not so much liking the premise of these stupidities, thanks for this blog) https://www.facebook.com/TiaLola67

  21. [...] Fifty Shades of F*cked-Up. ~ Trista Hendren (elephantjournal.com) Share this:EmailTwitterFacebookTumblrDiggRedditLike this:LikeBe the first to like this. [...]

  22. elephantjournal says:

    Amen. This is, perhaps more fundamentally than anything, about the next generation. I'm all for hot sex or all–but…not sure I'd want my sister/mother/children/anyone I cared about in this sort of, cough, relationship.

  23. Heather says:

    I thought I could no longer be shocked by the kind of mindless tripe that's being turned into best sellers these days, but I was wrong. A sad commentary on today's society.

  24. faye says:

    i feel nauseous – seriously.

  25. Autumroz says:

    Did you even read more than the beginning of the first book? If you had you would know that Ana is a strong minded woman. She does not become his submissive. She has a mind of her own which makes him change.

    • Jane says:

      If you do your research on abusive relationships, strong minded/willed/successful women are often times an abusers preferred choice as they offer more of a challenge and they get pleasure out of watching them deteriorate. And rarely, if ever, does an abuser make the choice to change because a women was stronger than him or showed him what love is/was – it's like that common misconception that girls/women have where "he is so misunderstood! if I'm nice to him, if I show him that I really care about him and love him like no one else has, he will change!". Seriously, you can't change anyone, they have to make the choice to change, and most abusers enjoy exercising their power and manipulative abilities too much to change.

      Abusers also rarely start off showing themselves which is why you may not know until too late what you have fallen into; they start off subtle and groom their adult victims not unlike pedophiles groom their young victims. So picking up on the signs can be difficult as well as they are so subtle(crazy making) and the lines get blurred, not unlike the abuse in this book.

  26. Lauren says:

    I notice none of your quotations are from other parts of the book, where the tables are turned? These are all from the first book. And you fail to note that Ana is made of much stronger stuff than this – she tries out the "lifestyle" and rejects it. Christian is falling in love with her, and chooses to give up his sexual habits for the sake of keeping the willful, independent Ana in his life. They end with quite an equal and mutually satisfying relationship.

    I agree – the "contract" was disgusting. I think if she'd signed it, I'd have put the book down right then and there. But, she didn't. And so, this review is quite misleading.

    My problem with the books had absolutely zilch to do with sex or politics, all of which I felt was perfectly acceptable for a book of this genre. My problem was the shoddy writing, and the fact that James is conning people into paying for something that was previously available for free as a fanfic piece.

  27. Robin Turner says:

    No way would I read a book where the main characters are called Christan Grey and Anastasia Steele.

  28. @cocoapurl says:

    I just want to say to the auhor, "Thanks for your opinion." My opinion is that these quotes, taken out of the context of the story, do seem abusive. However, Anastasia is not a submissive and did not sign the BDSM contract. She was in a consensual, adult relationship with a dominant man who had emotional and psychological issues. Yet, he toned down his dominance for her and she found out that she enjoyed some of the kinkier aspects of sex. They compromised for each other sexually . She couldn't touch him because of his own abuse and his past. The fact that he needed sexual control probably had something to do with his attraction to the BDSM lifestyle, but together they were able to address his issues from his past. In the story, she was the strong one and he was the weak one.__Was their relationship a model relationship? Heck no

  29. [...] the erotica novel Fifty Shades of Grey continues to soar in sales and in the imaginations of many women and their men, I thought it might [...]

  30. [...] Heaves of Puke (Bizzybiz) Pamela Stephenson-Connolly on why Fifty Shades is bad bondage Fifty Shades of F*cked Up (Elephant Journal) (links to other good articles) Fifty Shades of Suck (warning: this one is not kink-positive, but [...]

  31. wiccanwoman says:

    Didn't this began as fanfiction re: Twilight? Are there any links to the actual writings before the creation of "Ana" and "Christian"?

  32. [...] The most recent association with shades of gray implies sex, the taboo and indulgent entertainment o… [...]

  33. anon says:

    I have not read the book, but for a woman to think so much of and love someone so twisted only because he needed her (but not legitimately love her) has not found self-love, and that to me is saddening. :(

  34. [...] apologies to my female friends who loved Fifty Shades, when I saw this in the bookstore I wasn’t sure whether to laugh or [...]

  35. Sally says:

    Yes, Christian Grey is a psycho. This relationship is nnot a healthy BDSM relation. He abuses her and makes her feel inferior. He loves to hurt and makes her feel that is her fault when he punish her. She is afraid that he will beat her if she doesn’t do what he tells her. This is not romantic story and Mr. Grey is not sext at all. A man likes this will never change. I don’t like the message this book is sending to young women. A women cannot change an ababuser to a loving man. We don’t have the power and is not our job! Love cannot fix a mentally sick man. I know this is a fiction book but I know many women like Ana and many men like Christian grey. Sometimes fiction books reflect society problems. We need to take emotionally abuse and physical abuse seriously.

  36. [...] I cannot speak for those with real disorders and chronic issues, I can speak to the common human experience of melancholy and feelings of being [...]

  37. [...] their erotic opening with the world (yes, that includes E.L. James, regardless of your opinion of 50 Shades), I want to scream from the rooftops “Write on! Your expression is my inspiration! Your voice is [...]

  38. [...] section of Portland, Oregon. In many aspects, I am a typical candidate for consumption of so called mommy porn. Who am [...]

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