“A letter to my dead girlfriend.”
This letter, below, is so beautifully, simply shared. And it so fucking sad, and so utterly ordinarily human, voiced without drama or subterfuge.
Death—a passing from one state to another—is both earth-shaking, and profoundly common. I thank this gentleman for showing us his heart.
Death happens, and can happen at any moment. Love today, and aim true. ~ ed.
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Originally Posted: Sun, 25 Oct 13:36 CDT
A letter to my dead girlfriend – m4w
Date: 2009-10-25, 1:36PM CDT
A few girls have put the moves on and as you know picking up women is not a forte of mine. It seems the grieving boyfriend seems to be a good angle. Who knew! I went on one date and spent it talking about you, the poor girl. You would have found it quite witty I think. No other dates to report, I am going against your orders to move on for now.
I found one of those hair tie things that somehow managed to squeeze into every crevice in the apartment. It was under the bed. I sat on the floor holding it and cried. Until then I had held everything together but it just all came flooding out.
Every morning when I wake up I forget for a fraction of a second that you are gone and I reach for you. All I ever find is the cold side of the bed. My eyes settle on the picture of us in Paris, on the bedside table, and I am overjoyed that even though the time was brief I loved you and you loved me.
Love,
P.
- Location: Michigan and Wacker
- it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
PostingID: 1437101323
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Oh how my heart aches reading this! A bittersweet and beautiful letter to his love..
I kindly thank you for sharing this.
Why I am typing, I don't really know because words escape me… it's beautiful, yet poignant and when I say that I am speaking of the love that they must have shared. Thank you for sharing this – great perspective.
Oh the weight of an empty heart! I wish for yours to be filled.
Expresses the unbearable sorrow and emptiness of losing someone you shared everything with in life and even after until you are able to continue on your own or with someone else.
Crawley wow….. this is so moving. raw.
Sarah Oh holy hell, Waylon. Brilliant. True. Powerful. Thank you. Being human ain't so bad.
Karyn How very moving and hard to digest. Thank you for sharing, boyfriend. My thoughts are with you.
Annie Try a little tenderness in the worst of situations with loved ones.
Susan Ste.Marie Needed that…. Ty
My fiance died in August. The surrealness and 'normalcy' that both mix and switch roles in my experience since his death is what I feel here. How eventually we try to be and do normal things, but it's just . . . not. The stupidest but most tender tiny details that you wouldn't think would matter that unglue us (for me it was the egg carton, he ate them every morning, or his diet Mountain Dew in the grocery store). And yes, the knowing that our Love wants us to be happy and "move on", while the ironic ultimate testament of true love, is, at least for the foreseeable future, such a ridiculous notion . . . "Boyfriend", I feel you. The love, it really is enough. And we are, even in this end, so, so blessed. . .
Wow. Thank you for sharing, Shannon. If you feel like it would be personally helpful, and helpful for others, cathartic, please do feel most sincerely invited to share your heart/story on elephant. write@elephantjournal.com and mention that I invited you to do so, so we're sure to pay great attention to your submission. ~ Waylon
Glad I checked back, thanks, Waylon, I will sit with that invitation & see . . . one thing I've found helps the most is simple acknowledgement of my pain, which you have already done with your comment, so thank you!
I’ve never commented on an article, but this one just let the tears roll down on my cheeks. I wish you a lot of strength! Thank you for sharing, Rose
My fiancé passed away a bit over a year ago as well. I have struggled with everything you have just wrote. Oddly enough, I found a hair tie under my bed when I dropped my phone and reached under to find it. To me, it was just my sweetie saying hi. I had to smile at you remarks of the shoe give away. I hosted a similar party, my Jeni loved her shoes… After all this time, this is the first time I have felt like there might be someone who understands the pain and struggles of basic daily living. Thank you my friend.
I really know how you feel … Please belive me .. I was going to marry my Honey ….my one true love Joanne, but one night , without warning ..she just ….Passed …I was numb ..didn’t know how to react or how to deal … For many years I had insomnia and I would drive in her old neighborhood all night long then go right to my day job. It has been ten years on Nov 17 th and stil I talk to her every day as I drive to work and every nite when I drive home . I still cry for her and for the life that we should have had and the beautiful children we would have made ..P.S. I got married in 2005 but I will always long for my beautiful sweet Joanne