Birth: It’s Not Just for Babies
I used to believe that childbirth was the only true opportunity in a woman’s life to determine just exactly what she was made of.
However, I’ve endured more change in the last two months than I ever thought possible. I separated from my husband of 17 years, my mother died and came back to life in front of me, I moved my home and my business, friends of 20 years “broke up” with me without speaking to me first, my car died, my website was hacked and I sprained both of my ankles.
Through all of this sudden change, I discovered we all have the capacity to give birth-if not through our physical wombs, then through the womb of our creative beings.
When I was a doula and childbirth instructor, I used to tell women in preparation for their labor that this will be the only time in their life they get to simultaneously have one foot solidly planted in the physical world and the other in the spiritual. I would also warn them that this straddled stance will require more balance from them than any other event in their adult life.
Yet, I now know the labor and delivery of a human child is definitely not the only time we are given this sacred opportunity to open, move and shake the foundations of our physical and spiritual selves.
We can experience this straddling of worlds every time we birth something new into the world-human or otherwise.
In the case of the latter, our focus and intent can create a new phase of life, a new career, a new relationship, a project or the launch of a new product or service. In each case, the general arc of the birthing process is the same.
As women, our creations are born through us, not handed to us. A freshly washed and wrapped life is typically not the experience of many women who have decided to create themselves and experience rebirth. It requires a ferocious type of strength and a clear vision in order for your unique creations to gestate and be birthed into the world.
The ability go with the flow is essential if you want the birth process to progress with ease.
Flow is the uniquely feminine ability to first accept what is happening in the process (no matter how much it may stray from your very well articulated plan) and then to allow it to enter you and co-create with you. As the divine feminine, your ability to cooperate with and surrender to the wisdom that is flowing through you in each individual moment(especially the challenging ones), will prove to be your greatest strength.
While giving birth to my daughter at home 12 years ago, in the depth of labor I said to all those present, “This baby knows exactly what she’s doing.” And until that particular moment I was sure I was having a boy! I could feel the wisdom of the energy that was guiding my baby through the birth canal and moving through me. It was so beautiful and powerful that I chose to completely give myself over to it.
I realized in that moment I no longer needed to control anything else about this labor and I felt free.
Until that moment ,I had not realized that something greater than I had ever known existed was moving through me and she had this process handled. Relaxed, I no longer felt any need to control what I or my body did. Not only did the rest of the labor change from that point on, I was permanently transformed from a girl who was disconnected to the power that lived within me to a woman who would never forget.
In order to experience the depth of this feminine power, one must relinquish the culturally pervasive habit to judge what is happening. When any part of the process is labeled as good or bad, right or wrong, a disservice is immediately done to the strength of that inherent wisdom that lives in you and is guiding the process along with you.
In all circumstances, inner preparation is essential to a successful outcome. It is the state of our inner being that dictates how smoothly the birth of a new life will unfold (either in the form of an actual baby or the new life one is called to create after the old one has withered on the vine).
Through the entire growth/birth/creation process, support is essential. Professional transition support in the form of a coach or a birth doula can put you in the right mindset and remind you how to be the cooperative component with the wisdom that already is coursing through you. This kind of support can also set up the sacred environment to help you feel safe enough to open and to be able to trust yourself to do what feels right.
Ultimately it will be you who knows when it is time to move or moan or push or rest.
At any given moment within you, there is always something ready to die and simultaneously, to be birthed through you. What are you growing in your womb of creation now? What gorgeous thing is meant to come to this world only through you?
Ironically, it is only when you open more than you ever thought possible and you give your body, mind and spirit over completely to the process of your new creation is when you recall and unfold your true essence and find out exactly what you are made of.
In my case, this creation of my new life on the other end of so much change is still in the newborn phase. And just like it was when my daughter was born, I am in love with it already.
Stephanie Yost, CPCC is a master change agent lighting fires to the talents and passions of the worlds’ most underdeveloped resource: women, Stephanie Yost, CPCC is a master change agent lighting fires to the talents and passions of the worlds’ most underdeveloped resource: women, between 30 and 50 years alive.
A Certified Professional Co-Active Coach with over 15 years of experience in women’s empowerment initiatives, Stephanie’s international private practice thrives by igniting the fires of freedom and creativity under entrepreneurial endeavors. She specifically helps women discover what they truly want from themselves despite all the years of putting themselves last.
When Stephanie is not coaching women to live their most expressive truths, she gets lost in the foothills of Boulder, CO with her vibrant daughter and lovable junk-yard dog. She believes that women only improve with age and that radical self-care is the secret to the universe. Connect with Stephanie personally on Facebook or Twitter. To receive her monthly life leadership newsletter, Bloom! visit www.gumtreegrowth.com.
Editor: April Hayes
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