Yoga Boner. {NSFW video}

Via on Oct 20, 2012

Damnit Janet I can not handle...there’s some good not-so-yogic lyrics in this here silly alert.

PS: for all those offended by these lyrics, click here and get upset about this instead—it really matters.

LYRICS:
Ooooooooooommmmmm…

JELLY: Shit! I got a yoga boner Teacher? want to get up on her Students? I wanna tap these ladies
on their backs in a happy baby

DIGGS: damn, I got a yoga stiffy… this situation’s iffy if these new age chicks take a look at my dick
stickin out, shit they gon hit me

JELLY: ooh, I want to do you women
woo you outta your lulu lemon

DIGGS: Damn it, Janet! I cannot handle
ya camel toe when ya land in camel

JELLY: Sasha, I don’t mean to harass ya but i love yo ass-uh, when you do a vinyasa
nasa-shavashna…

DIGGS: Uhh… that ain’t a thing.

BOTH: Oouu! the way you bend like a pretzel it’s hella sexual What my gonna DO? (whisper: I’m confused.) i want to get next to you can i interest you in a Yoga Boner-er-er-er?!

DIGGS: That’s what we call the hook of the song… Where’s Jelly?

JELLY: floatin with my third eye open
hopin my third leg gets some gropin

INSTRUCTOR: picture yourself on a prana ocean

JELLY: keep talkin like that, i’ll blow my load, hun

DIGGS: I can’t believe this shit’s in Oakland

JELLY: I can’t believe my hips are open!

INSTRUCTOR: your inner-child will rise to meet us

JELLY: not to mention my inner pe-nus

DIGGS: i want a yoga hotty, one with a yoga body

JELLY: and she hasta be a jedi masta
’cause she talks like Yoda only sorta naughty

DIGGS: i’ll give ya a spank holdin’ plank

JELLY: i like your dolphin, you come here often?

DIGGS: bro, let me get my hands on those

JELLY: dude, hold up, that’s child’s pose

BOTH: cock block!

BOTH: Heh… What?
Oouu! good goddess good gracious your taint is right where my face is Boo! (whisper: can i call you boo?) I will be a warrior for you I’ll be a warrior too with my Yoga Boner-er-errrr!

JELLY: Hold up… why they all lookin at me Like the whole class is about ta slap me

DD: dude, you know what they say ya can’t spell Namaste without most ah nasty so what up girl let’s do this

JELLY: smoke some Buddha, ya sexy Buddhists.

DD: aren’t you hippies mostly nudists?

ALL GIRLS: No…we were sent here by Shiva to destroy you.

BOTH: Ohh… you’re even more sexy
When you’re snappin my neck
I think you broke my nose
You don’t know what you do to me
I’m bleeding profusely from my Yoga Boner-er-errrr!

JELLY: If this is chattar-WRONG-ah… i don’t want to be right.

DIGGS: Girl, you don’t love me. You just love my downward doggystyle

~

 

They call it…”Yoga”.

With thanks for the hot tip to number one on this list.

Join: Elephant’s Summer 2015 Academy: a Certificate Apprenticeship in Social Media, Journalism Ethics & Editing.

Facebook is in talks with major corporate media about pulling their content into FB, leaving other sites to wither or pay up if we want to connect with you, our readers. Want to stay connected before the curtain drops?
Sign up for our curated, quality newsletters below.


Incorrect source, offensive, or found a typo? Email us (please put title in subject bar of email so we'll be able to fix). Or do you want to write for Elephant?
{Waylon H. Lewis C Enterprises 2015: Use Rights in perpetuity. Ownership remains with author.}

About Waylon Lewis

Waylon Lewis, founder of elephant magazine, now elephantjournal.com & host of Walk the Talk Show with Waylon Lewis, is a 1st generation American Buddhist “Dharma Brat." Voted #1 in U.S. on twitter for #green two years running, Changemaker & Eco Ambassador by Treehugger, Green Hero by Discovery’s Planet Green, Best (!) Shameless Self-Promoter at Westword's Web Awards, Prominent Buddhist by Shambhala Sun, & 100 Most Influential People in Health & Fitness 2011 by "Greatist", Waylon is a mediocre climber, lazy yogi, 365-day bicycle commuter & best friend to Redford (his rescue hound). His aim: to bring the good news re: "the mindful life" beyond the choir & to all those who didn't know they gave a care. elephantjournal.com | facebook.com/elephantjournal | twitter.com/elephantjournal | facebook.com/waylonhlewis | twitter.com/waylonlewis | Google+ For more: publisherelephantjournalcom

1,779 views

Leave a Reply