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February 14, 2013

The Season of Impermanence.

Why do we human beings use the word permanent, to describe so much?

There is no such word, whether it is a job, a relationship, a dog or a cat, the seasons and that crumbling building down the street…all are not permanent.

Well, I take that back; the only way permanent has truth is with love. Unconditional love is permanent. If we are walking this planet or have moved on, love is left in our place. Love is all that remains for eternity.

What about impermanence?

The people who have brought impermanence to the forefront for me have been a group of amazing and wonderful people. I’ve been interviewing cancer survivors, family members and friends over the past two weeks—I’ve learned a thing or two from these incredible spirits.

They have a lightness of being, rather than the heaviness many of us carry.

Many already visited their own depths of hell and decided it wasn’t where they wanted to live. It came down to the choice of being happy now, rather than focusing on the possible impermanence of them not being here tomorrow.

Stories in which I felt such sorrow for the loss, kept reminding me over and over, we are all impermanent. “We are but a moment’s sunlight fading in the grass.” (From my favorite song, ever!)

The recognition that our human bodies are not immortal and can turn into our worst enemy through the randomness of the cards we are dealt, gives us a choice.

Fear or love: fear of dying or to love every moment we have here on this earth.

As the people I spoke with stated, “I choose to be happy knowing that all I have been promised is this moment, today.”

One in particular planted flowers in her garden that she knew would bloom whether she was here or not; she felt her hand touching the soil and that her family would have that part of her.

Her unconditional love.

Other wisdom shared with me by these courageous human beings was to not wait.

What are you waiting for! You want it? Go for it.

Real love never goes away; we love people whether they are in our lives or not, so can we just deal with it? Be okay with loving others.

What if you aren’t here tomorrow? You’ll never have had the opportunity to try, engage, or tell someone you love him or her…unless you don’t wait.

Waiting connotes permanence, especially when it’s something within your control that you can decide to take action towards. The thing you are waiting for may never come to you or it may be gone by the time you get the cajones up to move toward it.

And then what? You have this monkey on your back, called…

Regret.

Regret for your life unlived, your inability to get past your own obstacles in your head to do the thing you want to do! Screw regret!  If the moment is all you have, and you really understand that, then maybe you can invite impermanence in instead of resisting it.

It’s time to really look at impermanence. Face it and embrace it. Be happy for the moment, whatever it brings, even if things are completely a disaster, who cares?

Doing this without being faced with a possible illness threatening our very lives can be a challenge we can get caught in our own minutia.

The minutia is another thing these people who have survived remarkable odds don’t sweat.

Our problems die with us, how important are many of them really? Are we alive right now?

Live today with the realization that all is impermanent, everything, even a thought process, a theory, daylight, etc…all of it; it should make us less fearful of change and what is not permanent.

Some people are afraid to leave the comfort of the fear of impermanence. For they are used to it or are afraid if they live on a bit brighter side that something bad will happen.

As long as you are still given the ability to breathe and live, we should then honor all that will eventually end and enjoy the ride anyway.

I wish you a journey filled with life.

“Love is but a song we sing
fears’ the way we die
You can make the mountains ring
or make the angels cry.”

~ Youngbloods

 

 

 

Ed: Bryonie Wise

 

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