My heart is in a million pieces.
It’s held together by dark matter,
Stuff that holds galaxies together.
No one can see it.
We feel it.
It’s in the ether. It rules the cosmos.
First there was darkness. Love is the gravity
That keeps us all together, even out past
What any eye can see. The spirals spin
Us into wholeness…. waves of light
Making a path with a black hole at center.
My black hole is pouring light out from within.
My black hole cannot take any more in.
My black hole sits between
My dancing soul and singing spirit.
My black hole feeds my heart shards of light
Fills up my eyes with tears
That no longer cry…
My heart’s doors keep opening to close
And closing to open. I know blood flows.
I am writing. There’s feeling somewhere
But think I lost its meaning.
There’s meaning somewhere but
It has no feeling.
Tonight I’d like to be a star.
Then no one would miss me because it would
Take light years to be seen, and light years
To go missing. In that time I could die and rise
A thousand time. But few will know how many times
I have died and fewer still how I always rise.
Yes, if a heart can shatter more than once, more
Than twice, then it can shatter a million times.
I like to say I have 45 lives for each cat
And now I am 54 so think I need a few more lives,
Or maybe I can trade in my heart for one that will
Finally pop or split or simply stop.
I don’t think so though.
I think I am going to live a long time.
And in that time I bet my heart will break
A million more times.
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Ed: B. Bemel
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