About: Michelle Marchildon
Posts by Michelle Marchildon:
Why I Write for elephant. ~ Michelle Marchildonby Michelle Marchildon on May 16, 2013 Whenever I travel or teach in foreign places, like Canada, or Boulder, people want to know the same thing: Why do I write for elephant journal? When I published “Finding More,” I thought the public may want to know if it was true (yes). And when I published “Theme Weaver,” I thought they may want [...] 408 views |
Teaching is Not Easy in a Crisis.by Michelle Marchildon on Apr 17, 2013 I was in my basement office when my son came down to say that a bomb went off at the Boston Marathon. Then he returned to say that he just saw a man without legs. I was getting ready to teach in a few hours, after dinner, homework, laundry and now apparently this, a horrific [...] 1,218 views |
How to Get Rid of Belly Fat. ~ Michelle Marchildon.by Michelle Marchildon on Apr 15, 2013 I recently clicked on a video that promised it would get rid of my belly fat. After all, I am in favor of anything that will get rid of my ample midsection, especially if all I have to do is click. Up until now, I’ve tried dieting, exercising and even prayer, but nothing seems to [...] 4,896 views |
Word! Darren Rhodes Dishes about Yoga Drama, YogaHour & What it’s like to Be a Father.by Michelle Marchildon on Apr 1, 2013 Darren Rhodes, international yoga teacher and asana model for the style formerly known as Anusara, was the first major teacher to leave the school in 2012 along with Christina Sell. Their departure sent shock waves through the community, and ultimately the fastest growing yoga school in the world foundered six months later. Since then, Darren [...] 3,915 views |
How to Write & Sell a Book, but Mostly Sell It.by Michelle Marchildon on Mar 29, 2013 To all the aspiring writers out there: Do you have a book in you? I had one in me for 35 years. My college professor contacted me every single year asking if I wrote my story, yet, and every year I had to say I had not because life got in the way. Until last [...] 604 views |
How to Know a Real Voice When You Hear One. ~ Michelle Marchildonby Michelle Marchildon on Mar 17, 2013 Therefore, if someone is telling you they are a real voice in yoga, and that everything is love and light, and the only thing that matters is love, and people are always good, and the world is always sunshine, and if we chant our hearts are one, and that everyone else is un-yogic, and that your butt looks good in Luon, run. That’s right, run. 2,034 views |
Over it! Why Anonymous Comments Are Meaningless, or Just Mean.by Michelle Marchildon on Mar 11, 2013 Let me tell you what I really think about the anonymous internet comments that plague just about every writer these days. I think they suck. On the one hand, I admit, it’s pretty nice to hear that I have supported, encouraged and given voice to millions (okay, maybe just a hundred or so) of [...] 383 views |
When a Queen Bee Zaps Your Ass-Ana.by Michelle Marchildon on Mar 6, 2013 I will never forget the day the ballerina came to teach yoga at my local studio. She did not actually walk into the building. She kind of sailed in on tiptoe, then with arms overhead she did a pirouette and landed at the front desk. Entrances were her thing. Within two weeks the ballerina had [...] 4,045 views |
Maybe This Time Will Be Different. ~ Michelle Marchildonby Michelle Marchildon on Feb 24, 2013 In Sunday’s edition of The New York Times, the “Meh List” declared that “teachable moments” are over. Thank efffing God! I cannot tell you how many times I have had teachable moments. In fact, you could say that all of last year was one big teachable moment. Worse, my inability to learn anything from these times [...] 1,437 views |
When Yoga Voice Drowns out the Real Voice.by Michelle Marchildon on Feb 18, 2013 If you practice yoga, then you know all about yoga voice. It is a sing-song, la-di-da way of speaking that makes most of us want to scream. But yoga voice is also a kind of groupthink that has infected yoga and it’s making even the smart people lose their mind. Groupthink is a psychological term [...] 2,679 views |
Top 10 Ways to Piss Off Waylon Lewis.by Michelle Marchildon on Feb 13, 2013 Following a recent rant by our Fearless Editor and Big Dog Buddhist, I thought it might be a great time to post what pisses off Waylon Lewis the most in journalism. I happen to be an expert, because over the past year I have pissed him off probably as much as every other writer [...] 710 views |
How to Get Someone You Love to Try Yoga.by Michelle Marchildon on Feb 11, 2013 I like to think that teaching and writing about yoga is changing the world, one down dog at a time. But then I think it might be best to change those around us first, especially those we love. In my case, my family really has no idea what-so-ever of what I do. For instance, there [...] 1,046 views |
The State of the Union in Yoga: New Schools, New Code of Behavior.by Michelle Marchildon on Feb 6, 2013 So far 2013 is turning out to be a bit better than last year in the yoga world. For one thing, nobody—not one guru—has been caught with their yoga diapers down. That’s a relief. And it’s been a whole month! Furthermore, no schools of yoga have exploded as of yet. But what could ever match [...] 563 views |
This War is All But Lost. ~ Michelle Marchildon.by Michelle Marchildon on Jan 20, 2013 40 years ago this week, Roe vs. Wade was made into law and forever changed the lives of women who wished to fight the tyranny of enforced birth. Like most wars for civil rights, Roe vs. Wade was not won on January 22, 1973. It was begun. And now it is slowly being lost, state [...] 1,089 views |
The Yogi Muse on Choosing Teacher Training, Certification & Famous Teachers.by Michelle Marchildon on Jan 18, 2013 Dear Yogi Muse, How should I choose a Yoga Teacher Training (YTT) program? There are so many to pick from, and I don’t know what to do. Do you have any advice? Perplexed Power Yogi Dear Perplexed: This must be January because in addition to losing weight and exercising more, lots of people [...] 1,966 views |
Jodie Foster: L.G.B.T. is also spelled M.Y.O.B.by Michelle Marchildon on Jan 14, 2013 Source: hairstylesolution.net via Katy on Pinterest There is something about turning 50 that just fills you with so much sass and “I-don’t-give-a-rat’s-ass” that it is downright empowering. That was on display last night at the Golden Globes when Jodie Foster, all 80 pounds of her, took the stage to receive a lifetime achievement award. Standing [...] 1,679 views |
I Will Not Look the Other Way. {Trigger Warning}by Michelle Marchildon on Jan 6, 2013 Trigger Warning: this article is graphic, painful. So here’s an interesting thing you may not have known about the young woman who was brutally raped by six men on a bus in India last month: She was left naked and bleeding on the street, after her assailants rammed an iron pole inside her, which damaged [...] 7,105 views |
How to Lose Weight: Look for More Instead. ~ Michelle Marchildon.by Michelle Marchildon on Dec 31, 2012 It’s not about loss. It’s about more. That’s what I told a New York editor. This year if you want to lose weight, believe you deserve more. 783 views |
Peace Motherf***ers! What I’m Leaving Behind from 2012. ~ Michelle Marchildon.by Michelle Marchildon on Dec 27, 2012 For many of us, it was a year defined by massive transformation and loss. I hope it means that we have survived a clearing of Universal proportions for 2013. For me, I lost Anusara, a yoga school I loved, and innocence about the teachers I adored. Moving forward, this is what I’m now leaving behind [...] 2,118 views |
Could a Yogi Use a Gun?by Michelle Marchildon on Dec 19, 2012 Following the horrific mass killing of innocent children and their beloved teachers in Connecticut, Colorado had the single largest day for people getting gun permits in the history of the state. I am not happy about this. What’s more, I am soon to be one of them. You would not think that a yogi—a peace-loving, [...] 435 views |
How to Get Over a Yoga Divorce. ~ Michelle Marchildonby Michelle Marchildon on Dec 6, 2012 … 2,742 views |
Anderson Cooper—Do Not Fight Back When the Trolls Attack!by Michelle Marchildon on Nov 23, 2012 I know just how Anderson Cooper feels who, while reporting on the skirmish in the Middle East with bombs exploding around his head, has to deal with Internet trolls attacking his sexual preference on Twitter. I don’t know how he feels regarding the sexual preference, because my preference these days is to get it over with [...] 505 views |
 How to Deal with the Menopausal Woman in the Room.by Michelle Marchildon on Nov 17, 2012 Hint: It’s just like the stoner! Everyone probably already thinks I am stoned, because I live in Colorado and I often put the wrong foot forward in yoga. I want to clear this up: I am not stoned. I am menopausal. I recently wrote a blog about how to deal with stoners in the room and [...] 1,865 views |
6 Ways to Deal with the Stoner in the Room.by Michelle Marchildon on Nov 13, 2012 Now that Colorado is perhaps the first of many states to pass a law that allows for using marijuana recreationally, it’s not unlikely that we’ll have more and more stoners in our yoga classes. Since I currently teach in Colorado where you can legally light up if you have a headache or a splinter, I have [...] 4,268 views |
Book Review: The Path that Leads Us Home.by Michelle Marchildon on Nov 8, 2012 *Note: I received this book for free in return for review the said offering. That said, I says what I wants—good or bad, happy or sad. I confess that reading Misadventures of a Garden State Yogi—which is also subtitled, My Humble Quest to Heal My Colitis, Calm My ADD, and Find the Key to Happiness—by [...] 209 views |
The Republicans Need to Fix Their Karma.by Michelle Marchildon on Nov 7, 2012 The election is over, but the national obsession with my uterus continues. 582 views |
Why Yogis Shouldn’t Drive. ~ Michelle Marchildonby Michelle Marchildon on Nov 1, 2012 … 336 views |
Dear Yogi Muse: On the Yoga Police & Being Perfect.by Michelle Marchildon on Oct 22, 2012 So this is how I deal with the Yoga Police: some days just require Xanax 622 views |
When Children Suffer, the Parents Do Too.by Michelle Marchildon on Oct 10, 2012 I am waiting for my teenage son to emerge from surgery. This much I know for sure: Parenting is nothing like what I thought it would be. I thought it was going to be all sweetness and light! I was an older mother years ago when we started our family. When we had our boys, [...] 498 views |
What to Wear to a Yoga Conference. ~ Michelle Marchildon.by Michelle Marchildon on Oct 1, 2012 Enlightenment is not about the pants… 2,572 views |
Dear Yogi Muse: From the Men, Moobs, Tats & More.by Michelle Marchildon on Sep 19, 2012 Dear Yogi Muse: If my mat gets too sweaty during class it causes back farts. Will that reduce my chances of scoring with the girl next to me? Don’t sweat the petty, pet the sweaty Dear Sweaty: If I am first to tell you that you are not supposed to be hitting [...] 1,264 views |
John Friend is (already) back. Anusara is Dead.by Michelle Marchildon on Sep 12, 2012 Who invited John Friend to Hatha Yoga? And the Universal Principles of Hatha? What happened to Anusara anyway? 17,358 views |
Gluten-Free & Fat. ~ Michelle Marchildonby Michelle Marchildon on Sep 4, 2012 In my continuing effort to seek enlightenment, I decided to go gluten-free. You will be a better yogi if you are both vegan and gluten-free, everyone says so. And probably it couldn’t hurt if you add in a little hula hooping and Acro Yoga too. However, since I am uncoordinated and terrified of heights, [...] 796 views |
Dear Yogi Muse: to Boob or Not to Boob, Popularity Contests & Are Hula Hoopers Yogis?by Michelle Marchildon on Aug 29, 2012 “Dear Yogi Muse” features the questions and issues facing today’s yogi, expertly answered by the imperfect Yogi Muse, Michelle Marchildon. On Boob Jobs Dear Yogi Muse, Would getting a boob job, face lift and sexy clothing increase my numbers in the classes I am teaching? Somewhat Lacking Dear Somewhat, Yes. Sadly, [...] 2,389 views |
Nine Yoga Classes You Couldn’t Pay Me to Take. ~ Michelle Marchildonby Michelle Marchildon on Aug 25, 2012 We are near the end of the summer slow-down when many yogis abandon their studio to play outdoors. But that’s not the only reason yoga classes are coming up empty. Here are nine classes you couldn’t pay me to take advertised recently in Colorado. 1.Acro Yoga. This involves hanging upside down partially clothed on a [...] 2,124 views |
Why Jennifer Aniston is a Real Yogi. ~ Michelle Marchildonby Michelle Marchildon on Aug 20, 2012 Many of us in long-term relationships often spend the weekend dreaming about how to leave our partner (there are 50 ways? I’m only coming up with two or three). On the other hand, Jennifer Aniston is famously willing to try again. Aniston, who once said “The greater your capacity to love, the greater your capacity to [...] 14,736 views |
Will ‘Ho for Friends on Facebook.by Michelle Marchildon on Aug 13, 2012 Who do I have to sleep with to get a “like?” Just when I thought my social media skills couldn’t get any worse, Timeline arrived on my Facebook page. Timeline is like a guy at a bar who can’t take a hint; the new format has moved in and taken over all the conversation and [...] 805 views |
What you can do to improve your practice that has nothing to do with yoga.by Michelle Marchildon on Aug 6, 2012 Burned out on yoga? Need to get away from the studio and that teacher who won’t stop talking about herself? Want to actually experience summer? Then try these tips to improve your yoga practice with without stepping on a mat or getting into Luon. Practice yoga off the mat by being nice! OMG! Ideal opportunities [...] 632 views |
Why I Still Suck at Yoga.by Michelle Marchildon on Jul 31, 2012 After practicing for 15 years, I am not any better at yoga than the day I first rolled out my mat. I didn’t know anything then, and apparently, I’m no closer to enlightenment now. In fact, everything I thought to be true has been turned upside down this year. That 2012 is called “The Year of [...] 1,962 views |
Not Ready To Forgive.by Michelle Marchildon on Jul 23, 2012 I am sick of hearing about how we need compassion. Maybe it’s time to get pissed off? Today, Colorado, my new home, burns to the ground. The first attack came in waves of red and orange as fire struck the mountains left vulnerable by the pine beetle. Then this week the mass murderer, whose name [...] 1,037 views |
Katie Holmes: How to Know if You Were in a Kult. ~ Michelle Marchildonby Michelle Marchildon on Jul 9, 2012 … 6,209 views |
Men Who Marry Their Yoga Instructors. ~ Michelle Marchildonby Michelle Marchildon on Jul 1, 2012 … 4,249 views |
The Unwanted Guest: When Cancer Returns.by Michelle Marchildon on Jun 27, 2012 Summer is the time of year for many guests to arrive, to eat you out of house and home, but sometimes it feels like they will never leave. Unfortunately, my old friend cancer decided to make a surprise visit as well. Cancer has visited before. It was almost 25 years ago when I had a [...] 339 views |
Men Take Note: What Women Really Want.by Michelle Marchildon on Jun 18, 2012 Now that I have read all three books of Fifty Shades of Grey, twice, and nobody in my house has had anything to eat for at least two weeks, I have decided to leave my husband for Christian Grey. First of all, as far as pornography goes (or “erotica” as this is called), it [...] 933 views |
When Bad Botox Happens to Good Yogis. ~ Michelle Marchildonby Michelle Marchildon on Jun 5, 2012 … 1,168 views |
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So what are we fighting for? Is this “brand” worth saving?by Michelle Marchildon on May 20, 2012 It has come to this: Anusara the Brand versus Anusara the yoga. It pains me to write this opinion piece because I have teachers who I love on both sides of the argument. Now that John Friend has agreed (sort of) to exit the company he built, people believe we can put this house of [...] 679 views |
Attachment Parenting: Does It Work For Teens?by Michelle Marchildon on May 14, 2012 … 1,123 views |
A Mother’s Day Dream.by Michelle Marchildon on May 11, 2012 Forget flowers. This is what I want for mothers everywhere this year. >A good night’s sleep. If you have babies then Benadryl might help. If you have teenagers, let the air out of the tires of their car. >To be remembered. In my house, Mother’s Day often happens after breakfast, laundry, soccer, that thing we [...] 226 views |
What’s with all the Toxic Opinions?by Michelle Marchildon on May 6, 2012 Opinions have recently come under fire as yogis are discovering that many people have them, and this is apparently a bad thing. You see, in yoga it’s not “yogic” to have an opinion because that could be interpreted as a “judgment,” and we should not judge each other. That is called “Ahimsa,” from the Yamas [...] 577 views |
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