Kombucha drinker ticketed for DUI.

Via Jeffrey Woodruff
on Apr 26, 2011
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(Boulder, CO ~ Source: EJ Breaking News)

An unidentified woman (Julie, you know her) was ticketed last night for drinking under the influence. The underage woman was at a party and avoided any hard alcohol, opting instead for Kombucha.

Her Blood Alcohol Level (BAL) was 0.06- above the drunk driving limit.

Blood Alcohol Content after Kombucha consumption

As this was her first offense, she was given a 30-day suspended license and community service- cleaning up the Goose Creek bike path.

She was drinking Kombuchu in massive quantities for its cleansing, metabolism and digestive support, as advertised on the bottles.

Sorry Julie, busted Kombucha UI

EJ editor’s note, we probably should have divulged this fact upfront: this is comedy, a joke, satire, a work of fiction. Except that it’s probably happened, you know, at least a few times. ~ ed.



About Jeffrey Woodruff

Jeffrey is a competitive cross country skier and marathon runner. He has completed sixteen marathons in six countries. Jeffrey recently received his Master of Architecture at the University of Colorado Denver.


6 Responses to “Kombucha drinker ticketed for DUI.”

  1. maria says:

    The last time I tried to buy kombucha at my local supermarket, I got carded. I have wondered wether this means that I shouldn't drink it while driving. Or if I am an alcoholic! I love me some kombucha!

  2. […] I will admit that I have yet to try this stuff because I’m not huge fan of weird stuff floating in my beverages. But I might have to start since they’re rumored to help your hangover. Lindsay Lohan approves so who am I to disagree? Like miso, Kombucha is fermented which will help with your angry tummy. Too much alcohol disrupts the stomach lining and lets just say your digestive track can be a bit… upset. Kombucha is also been attributed to “restoring healthy balance in the body” and even contains a bit of alcohol itself – a little hair of the dog? […]

  3. […] ocean that is American health food chains with their Tofurky, 200+ types of hummus, raw bars and kombucha in all it’s forms. America is definitely the country of anything you want, at anytime. Did you […]

  4. […] here’s the thing; as grating as the kombucha and kumbaya crowd can be, their snide and snarky antagonists don’t seem to offer a very good […]

  5. Josef H. says:

    It’s a DUI investigation,” Copley said. “We were notified about the results of the blood test through the H.R. (Human Resources) Department. We will continue to conduct interviews, seek subpoenas for test records and turn that information over to the state’s attorney’s office.

  6. duidaily says:

    On the other hand, defense lawyers get a great deal of satisfaction when their representation of an accused individual has a positive impact on society. For instance, when a criminal defense lawyer helps a client avoid more serious legal consequences by intervening in lives to affect positive change